Heaven Help Us
by hiddenspikes
Summary: BEING REWRITTEN: My friends growing up had always said that I was too innocent. I hadn't done much with my life and that was okay until two of my girlfriends decided that maybe it was time for that to change, and thats when i met him
1. Heaven Help Us

**Disclaimer- TVD doesn't belong to me nor do I gain anything from writing this, it is strictly for fun and entertainment purposes only. I'm just borrowing the characters for a little while ;)**

**Cause I'll give you all the nails you need  
>Cover me in gasoline<br>Wipe away those tears of blood again  
>And the punchline to the joke is asking<br>Someone save us**

**Heaven help us now**  
><strong>Come crashing down<strong>  
><strong>We'll hear the sound<strong>  
><strong>As you fall<strong>

My friends growing up had always said that I was too innocent. At the age of sixteen I hadn't done much with my life, never been on a date, never been kissed, never even held hands with someone other than my younger brother. But as time passed on, two of my girlfriends decided that maybe it was time for that to change. I had barely been in Virginia for more than a month, my parents just barely having passed away and i was living with the family that I barely knew, my slightly wild aunt Jenna and her boyfriend Ric. His younger sister Caroline and I had become friends quickly, it was easier to open up to girls without being embarrassed seeing as I saw nothing sexual about them. Men on the other hand where a whole different story. Bonnie, Caroline's best friend was almost as instant as Caroline was that I needed to just live and that my innocence being lost was the best way to go about that.

We were sitting on the couch in the living room, watching a movie and talking because it was far too cold to be running around outside.

"Come on Elena just go with it, have fun I promise it'll be fine." Caroline giggled softly as I ran my fingers back through her hair, averting my eyes from the rather raunchy looking sex scene that was playing out on the movie.

"I just don't see what the big deal it…I'm not that innocent!" I protested glancing over at bonnie as she snorted.

"Elena you've done nothing to…"she paused a moment as I went bright red, the moans from the movie becoming rather frequent as clothes were shed. "You just need to be spontaneous for once, live a little!" I bit down on my bottom lip before losing the battle with myself and reaching for the remote, flipping forward a few chapters so that I could no longer see naked bodies.

"Why are we even having this conversation anyways, even if I wanted to do something about it tonight, there isn't much that can be done…let's face it apart from my aunts boyfriend and his best friend there isn't anyone here." Caroline smirked as she glanced over at bonnie, both of them coming to the same conclusion at the same time.

"Damon would do it." Caroline said climbing to her feet before pulling Bonnie to her own, both of their hands held out to me with a smile. I swallowed looking at their hands before shaking my head.

"Who even said that he would be willing to go for this?" I muttered. Caroline rolled her eyes before she was taking off down the hallways towards the back of the house muttering about a man-whore as she went and something that looked like trouble written across her features. Bonnie sat there staring at me, the movie forgotten, her hands on her hips as we waited patiently for Caroline to show back up. When she finally did her lips split into a huge grin and she reached down to take my hand, dragging me to my feet, Bonnie taking my other hand in hers. She smiled softly a slight bounce in her step as we all started down the hall, Caroline leading the way, Bonnie bringing up the back so I couldn't make a run for it.

"I promise Elena you aren't going to regret this, I mean you said you were attracted to him yeah, so why not have your first kiss already." Bonnie bit softly on her bottom lip before she shrugged.

"A kiss is just a kiss I could honestly care less if I have my first one done and over with already or not." I argued as Caroline just smiled slightly to herself.

"You'll like Damon I promise." Caroline whispered as she pushed open one of the doors and stepped to the side, Bonnie shoving me into the room. The door to the room was swiftly pulled shut behind me but I was too busy looking at the man in front of me to notice. His black hair was slightly long, shaggy to the point that it was hanging in his eyes, a smile curving over his pierced bottom lip as he looked over my body. I shivered biting down softly on my bottom lip as I blushed looking down at his black shoes trying to concentrate on anything but the burning of my cheeks.

"Uh hi…"I muttered cheeks flaring up as he chuckled softly, his voice low and slightly husky.

"You look nervous kid." I bit down hard on my bottom lip glancing up at him and regretting it instantly as he grinned down at me, stepping closer, "don't be, I promise I won't bite, unless you want me too that is." I let out a rushed breath, a tingle racing up my spine that had me shivering; I was going to kill the two girls as soon as I got out of there. "Are you sure that you want to do this, you don't seem like you really want too." I bit down on my bottom lip hard tilting my head some before looking up at him completely, taking in everything that I didn't notice before. Bright blue eyes framed with thick black eyelashes, a silver barbell gracing his left eyebrow, dimples touching both corners of his smile. Blushing hard I nodded, sucking slowly at my bottom lip as I watched him let out a slow breath.

"Relax," he muttered and then his fingers were running over my bottom lip, pulling it from between my teeth, his thumb lingering on the skin, stroking over it softly. "Relax," he repeated softly and then he was leaning down and pressing his lips firmly into mine, his hand moving to cup my cheek, the cool metal of his lip rings foreign against my skin.

I thought it would end there, that he would pull back, but then I realized that my hand had somehow ended up stroking over the back of his neck and I was pressing my lips just as firmly back into his. I stepped closer to his body as he reached down to hook his arm around my waist, his tongue with the cold metal of a tongue ring passing over my bottom lip. I hesitated a moment, unsure what to do but almost as if he sensed that his hand glided back onto my jaw, tapping it slightly before he pushed his tongue past my lips, stroking it slowly along my own.

The moan that pushed its way past my lips took me completely by surprise and I found myself pulling away even as Damon let out a sound of protest.

"Elena" I gasped startled that he even knew my name before he was pulling me close again, his lips fitting into mine as I backed up, my fingers tangled in his hair, half pushing him away from me half tugging him closer. His tongue was pushing past my lips as my fingers slid down onto his hip tugging him closer to me as he pressed my body back into his bedroom wall. He took my lips roughly, barely pausing to give any thought to the fact that it was my second kiss ever but I didn't care, my mind was in bliss as I tried to keep up with him. Every stroke of his tongue along mine, every nip of his teeth along my lower lip I could feel down every inch of my body, hands trembling as the traced a map over his back, clutching to him as he played my body like he'd been doing it for years.

Shirts were peeled off as we moved, pulling away from the cold hard wall only to move against his bed, my legs straddling his hips as he sat down, his hand resting against the curve of my ass. A faint whimper pressed its way past my lips as he slid his tongue ring along my tongue, clicking the metal ball against my teeth. His hands tugged my hips closer before they were pressing firmly into his, the noises escaping my lips growing increasingly louder the closer that we got. I was sure that my cheeks were bright red. Teeth sinking into my bottom lip he rolled his hips slowly up against mine, showing me what to do before I was slowly grinding back down against him, hands reaching up to cup the back of his neck as I did.

I pulled back from his lips, breathing ragged as I leaned my forehead against his, eyes squeezed shut as I tried not to think of the way that he was looking at me. He pressed my hips a little down onto his as he leaned down to skim his lips first along my jaw then down along my neck, teeth lightly grazing along the skin.

My nails dug into the back of his neck as he dipped his head down to bite along my collarbone, a smirk crossing his lips, a groan escaping my own. Things were moving fast, this was supposed to be my first kiss, not my first time doing anything else, but I couldn't bring myself to care, and it seemed neither did Damon as he leaned me backward, lips moving from my collar to trace down my chest, tongue flicking against my nipple.

"Jesus," I muttered squeezing my eyes shut and willing my heart to stop pounding as hard as it was in my chest, red creeping over my cheeks as Damon's tongue dipped into my belly button. He chuckled softly and glanced up at me, cocking an eyebrow slightly as he rested his chin against my stomach.

"Names' Damon but that's close enough." He smirked and I blushed hard biting into my lip as he ducked his head back down to slide his tongue along the top of my jeans before he was reaching down to undo the button. "You need to tell me now Elena if you wanna stop cause this is the point of no return." His voice was deeper than it had been as he kept glancing up at me, fingers stroking along the skin that my button had bared when he undid it. Biting harder into my bottom lip I realized that it was slightly bleeding, so instead of speaking I sucked on my bottom lip and nodded, closing my eyes as he tugged my zipper down.

He grinned and I found myself wanting to slink away from it but then his lips were back against my stomach, his fingers tugging down my jeans. Hot breath puffed its way across my lower stomach as he wiggled slightly, body never leaving mine as my jeans hit the floor.

"You're tensing up on me Elena, relax." He muttered, grazing his teeth along my hip bone, sucking slightly in random spots as he watched me. I swallowed, teeth sinking into my bottom lip as I contemplated telling him that I was a virgin, but as he passed his hand almost gently over the front of my panties, my mind went blank, the thought flying out of my head almost as if it hadn't been there to being with.

He slid up my body, that grin back in place before his lips were being pressed almost roughly into mine, teeth tugging at the lip that I had been sucking on. His hands slid onto my lower back, arching my body up against his as he tongue pressed past my lips, thrusting against my own in a mockery of what we were going to be doing. I protested when he pulled away from my lips a few moments later taking ragged breaths as I struggled to gain my composure, but then my fingers where in his hair tugging his lips back down against mine, breathing be damned.

He chuckled softly against my lips, flicking his tongue along the bottom one as he tugged back, reaching up to press his fingers along my lips.

"Suck." He commanded softly, tracing his thumb along my bottom lip with a soft smirk. I drew my eyebrows together slightly confused before I pulled his fingers into my mouth, sucking slowly but hard at them. He groaned, his eyes never leaving my lips as he pushed his fingers a little deeper into my mouth. "My god." He muttered, eyes half lidded as I closed my own, sucking a little harder. He sucked in a sharp breath before his lips were pressed back against my stomach tongue tracing along the skin. I hissed softly around his fingers sucking in a slow breath as he moved a little lower on my stomach with a soft laugh. He pushed his fingers a little more insistently against my lips so I sucked harder at them before biting down slightly as he pressed his lips to the front of my panties, letting out a hot breath against them.

"What are you doing?" I squeaked as he sucked slowly at the front of my panties my eyes squeezing shut. I wanted nothing more than to slip my fingers into his hair and hold him there against me, it felt so damn good. He pulled back a little chuckling softly against my skin before licking my lips.

"I'm going to fuck you." He muttered and I swear my breathing stopped.

**A/n- so thinking on it I decided that I was going to write an AU/AR story simply to practice writing. No I'm not giving up on addicted this will just be a way to relax**

**=) hopefully you guys like it. Don't forget to review. Until then**

**- Jayden**


	2. Famous Last Words

_** Well is it hard understanding **_

_**I'm incomplete**_

_** A life thats so demanding**_

_** I get so weak**_

_** A love thats so demanding**_

_** I can't speak **_

The second that the words left his mouth I knew that I was in for a world of trouble. His lips never left my skin as he drug the last bit of my clothing down my legs, a shiver following the moment. Taking a deep breath I tried to steel my nerves, wondering what the hell I thought I was doing with this man that I barely knew. A sharp nip to the inside of my thigh drew me out of my thoughts and to where Damon was laying down my body, his head resting against my thigh as he smirked up at me.

"are you back here with me babe?" he chuckled softly drawing a blush to my cheeks before he was drawing his tongue along my thigh, the metal ball on his tongue ring feeling cold against my overheated skin.

"Dear god." I muttered trying to keep my eyes open even as he trailed his teeth over the path that his tongue had just made.

"Hold onto the headboard." He muttered with another playful nip at my skin, and then he was pushing his tongue past my folds and deep into my pussy making my back arch and my lips open to let out one of the most embarrassing noises that I had ever made.

"What are you doing?" I whimpered trying to push him away from me even as he pulled back slightly to slip one of his fingers deep into my pussy, curling it slightly at the knuckle in a move that had my head spinning.

"Fuck your tight baby." He murmured ignoring my question and wrapping his lips around my clit with a quick suck, "we're just gonna have to change that though wont we…"licking his bottom lip he looked up at me, smirking like that cat that ate the canary, "grab ahold of the headboard baby." Then he was sucking hard at my clit before I even had a moment to say a word, another finger pushing with the first into my pussy. It started out slowly, a tense feeling, coiling deep in the pit of my stomach, something that I had never felt before and it scared me. "Just let it go baby." Damon hummed, the sound vibrating against my clit, a third finger joining the first two in a stretch that was almost painful in its intensity. He pulled back slightly and looked up at me before leaning down and blowing gently on my wet clit, and just like that, I saw stars.

Biting down on my bottom lip I whimpered softly, hands blotching roughly at the headboard above me.

"Oh good god." I panted, my breathing hard, my heart feeling like it would bust outta my chest at any given moment. Damon chuckled softly from his spot at the end of the bed, his head resting against my stomach, his fingers tracing designs idly on my bare skin as I came down from the first orgasm that I had ever had.

"You feel good beautiful?" he whispered turning to press a kiss to my stomach, his tongue dipping briefly into my belly button. Swallowing I nodded my cheeks going bright red once more, my body feeling half numb as I reached for the button on his jeans, popping it open. I was going to do this. Biting on my bottom lip I reached for his zipper and tugged it down just as a knock sounded on his bedroom door.

"Damon are you in there?" came this sickly sweet sounding female voice. Damon groaned and leaned his head back against my chest letting out a breath.

"fuck." He growled and then he stood up and walked over to the door, pulling it open, his jeans half hanging off his hips, his erection more than prominent. "What do you want Katherine?"

Katherine, the girl that had interrupted us, pushed her way into the room, a sneer written across what would have been a beautiful face if not for the ugly look that was on it.

"You stood me up." She snarled rounding on him after her eyes had scanned over me, making me feel more naked, more exposed and more insecure than anybody ever had managed to in my entire life, "and then when I come over here thinking you were sick or that something life or death threatening had happened to make it so you couldn't come I find you in bed with some…whore. What the hell Damon." Damon rolled his eyes and leaned against the door frame, folding his arms across his chest as he glared daggers at this woman.

"I never agreed to any kind of date with you Katherine." He snapped nodding towards his door, trying to force a hint on her that she just wasn't getting, "I wouldn't touch you with a ten foot pole, not after the games you played with my brother and me, and how dare you insult someone that you don't know. Elena is ten times the woman you will ever be." Katherine stamped her foot in a temper tantrum that would have made a two year old proud, "now get the hell outta my room, the sight of you makes me sick." Katherine glared at me and folded her arms across her chest in a defiant more, clearly marking her territory over the guy that I had just been about to have sex with. Damon growled before grabbing hold of her arm and forcefully removing her from his bedroom. The second the door was closed he was turning back to me looking almost apologetic for her. Feeling like a complete and utter idiot for almost handing over my virginity to him while he had a girlfriend, I reached down for my discarded clothing, my cheeks burning with embarrassment. Tugging on my jeans not bothering to even look for my panties, I did everything I could to keep from having to face him.

"Elena?" he questioned reaching for my wrist as I tugged my shirt over my head, the feeling of guilt starting to settle in my stomach, I was better than this.

"Just don't." I whimpered as the tears began to form at the corner of my eyes, "Christ, you have a girlfriend and now I feel like such a…a…slut." Scowling at myself I climbed to my feet and pushed past him, making my way towards the door. "I- I need to go." Damon had a look of frustration on his face, like he wanted to say something but didn't know how too word it, but I didn't care, instead I pulled open the door.

"Elena." He tried again, but I wasn't hearing any of it. Before I could make an even bigger fool of myself I walked out of his room, closing the door behind myself and cutting him off midsentence. The walk back to the living room was done in silence and I half wondered if that's what my friends meant by a walk of shame. The movie from earlier was barely rolling the credit when I finally got there, Bonnie and Caroline clearly waiting for me instead of paying any attention to the movie. Feeling worse than I had ever felt in my life I plopped down between the two of them on the couch.

"So how did it go?" Caroline questioned, unfolding her legs from under her. Four simple words and that's all it took for the tears to start falling. Dragging my knees to myself I tried to scrape up what was left of my dignity but knew that it would be useless. I was completely and utterately screwed, I knew that even thought I hadn't given him anything, Damon wasn't going anywhere, I would have to see him, and when that happened, all hell was going to break loose.

**A/n- yay, second chapter done! I know it's not as long as the first but don't worry the next one will be. Anyway thank you to everyone that has reviewed its much appreciated. Reviews= inspiration inspiration= fast, longer chapters. Yes I know things don't look good for our happy couple but no need to fear, they will have a happy ending cause I'm a sucker for happy endings. =) next chapter should be up in a few days, until then.**

**-Jayden**


	3. I'm Not Okay, I Promise

**_What will it take to show you that it's not the life it seems? _**

**_I've told you time and time again_**

**_You sing the words but don't know what it means_**

**_To be a joke and look,_**

**_Another line without a hook._**

**_I held you close as we both shook for the last time._**

**_Take a good hard look_**

**_I'm not okay! _**

The girls sat with my through my tears, their support obvious though I couldn't bring myself to tell them about Katherine, only that my parents death had hit me hard again. Claiming I was tired I excused myself and made my way towards the back of the house where my room was located. Slipping into a pair of shorts and a tank I climbed under the covers and tried not to think about everything that had happened to me in the last few hours. I was more than ready to just forget about all of it and get some rest, but unfortunately my body had other ideas, my skin still tingling from where I could feel the ghost of his lips. After a few hours of lying there I couldn't take it anymore, sighing I slipped out of bed and slowly moved into the hallway, hoping that some tea would be able to help me sleep. For the most part I didn't run into anybody, but then I got to the kitchen and the problem that I knew was going to come back to bite me in the ass was sitting at the counter, in only his boxers, a half cup of some dark amber liquid resting in his hands.

Biting my bottom lip I let out a slow breath and tried not to blush as I made my way over to the cupboard, grabbing the tea pot and filling it with water, the feeling of his eyes on my back making goose bumps form along my skin. Biting down harder on my bottom lip I set the pot on the stove and turned on the flame, determined to get through the whole process without making a complete and utter fool of myself.

"Elena?" turning to face him I sucked in a sharp breath when I realized that he had moved till he was directly behind me. "We need to talk." He muttered his hands slipping onto the counter next to me, boxing me in. closing my eyes I swallowed, my sudden sharp breath pulling in his scent, memories of how good his body felt against mine running rampant through my head, "Katherine isn't my girlfriend," he muttered reaching up to slip his fingers slowly along the side of my cheek, "she isn't anything to me, just a good time…I don't want her I promise…but you, you I just can't seem to get outta my fucking mind." He finally finished. Blushing hard it took everything in me to not tell him that he was the reason that I couldn't sleep, that I blamed him for the feeling that seemed to be crawling along my body that I couldn't get rid of, "Elena? Are you listening to me?" letting out a hard breath I nodded and bit down on my bottom lip trying not to show him how much he was effecting me, but the second I looked up and caught his eyes I knew I was lost.

Damon hesitated all of ten seconds before he was leaning down and pressing his lips roughly back into mine, his hands slipping into my hair to hold me too him. Mind reeling I gasped, my hands slipping onto the back of his neck as he took the moment, thrusting his tongue past my lips, his body molding into mine. The moan that escaped my lips took me completely by surprise but there it was again, that electricity that I had felt the first time he had kissed me. Briefly I wondered what the hell I was doing but then his hands were on my ass dragging my body closer once again and I couldn't really bring myself to care. I'd already screwed up when I didn't walk away the moment that I had saw that he was in the kitchen I might as well make it worth my while. Damon grunted softly, his hands hooking around my thigh as he hoisted my body up, forcing my legs to wrap around his waist, his body twisting away from the kitchen to walk us into the dining room, plopping down on one of the chairs. From there things progressed quickly, one moment we were both fully dressed and then the next my night shirt and shorts were both on the floor, his lips wrapped firmly around one of my breast sucking slowly at my nipple in a way that had my nails clawing at his back.

"D-Damon…" I whimpered out, tilting my head back.

"no talking." He all but growled out as his hands started to push my bra up my chest, his lips leaving dark red bruises along my skin. The second my bra was off he was leaning down and closing his lips around my nipple, teeth sinking into the skin as he sucked rather harshly. I groaned, fingers sinking into his hair, lips parted as I struggled to breathe against the pain and the pleasure that were swirling together, meant to drive me all the more insane.

"I should stop you me just for the shit you pulled." I growled out as his hands moved slowly along my stomach, stopping here and there to caress the skin in gentle movements. I swallowed waiting for the moment when it turned rough like I knew it would. Damon chuckled softly glancing up at me, pierced tongue slipping out of his mouth to circle my nipple, the metal feeling cold on my overheated skin. "Jesus Damon." I muttered squeezing my eyes shut as he slipped his hands down the front of my jeans. He chuckled against my skin, shivers shooting down my spine as he started muttering something under his breath his hands rubbing rather hard against the front of my panties.

Slipping my fingers into his hair I tugged his lips back up to mine as his fingers slipped past my panties, pushed my lips apart and plunged into my pussy, his tongue thrusting into my mouth as his fingers did. Moaning softly I let instinct set in, sucking slowly at his tongue as my legs tightened around his hips. Things were moving fast, faster than I would have thought possible, his thumb brushing in rapid circles on my clit, the somewhat familiar feeling in my stomach starting once again.

"You know you love me for it Elena." He smirked and then his lips were back on mine, tongue thrusting past my lips tangle with my own, one of his hands leaving my jeans to tangle in my hair. I growled against his lips as he sucked on my tongue like a pro, my hips grating down against his fingers in a slow movement, a totally opposite of our mouths. Tugging back from my lips he leaned down to seal his lips around my nipple once more, sucking roughly at the little nub, and a quick tweak to my clit being all that it took to push me over the edge. Damon groaned as my pussy clenched around his fingers, his face looking strained.

"Elena…" he groaned tugging his fingers from my panties, "I'm sorry but I need to fuck you…" He licked his lips as he pushed my panties to the side before reaching down to shove his boxers, the one scrap of clothing that he had been wearing down his hips. "now." Whimpering I looked down, my teeth sinking into my bottom lip as I took in the sight of his cock for the first time, briefly wondering how the hell it was ever going to fit in me. "Bite me…" he growled, reaching down to press his tip against my entrance. Shocked I didn't respond, but then his free hand was pressing roughly against the back of my neck, forcing me down to his throat. "Bite me!" moaning softly I bit down as hard as I could onto his neck as he thrust his length into my pussy. Screaming slowly against his shoulder I squeezed my eyes shut, pain raking over my body.

Damon held still his hands stroking my thighs as I sank my teeth back into his shoulder, fighting against the urge to tell him to pull out that I couldn't handle it. I had come this far I wasn't going to back down now.

"move." I moaned, pulling back from his shoulder just enough to speak. Damon nodded and shifted, moving to set me on the table before he slowly pushed his cock back into my pussy with a rough thrust. Sucking in a slow breath I shifted my hips slightly, hoping to get rid of some of the pressure I was feeling, but then Damon was thrusting back into my pussy, stroking against something inside me that had the pain becoming a distant memory as pleasure slowly started to take over. Tightening my legs around his hips I pulled his cock deeper into my pussy, needing the fullness, the slight pain, the pleasure but more than anything the distraction. Damon swallowed seeming to take my hint, pulling back a little only to thrust his cock a little harder into my pussy. Arching my back I pushed my body into his, dragging my nails hard over his back, needing him to speed up, to fuck me harder, anything to make it so I didn't have to think anymore. I knew it was wrong, using him to help me forget, forget my parents that I had lost, my friends from back home that I would never see again, the pain that I was feeling, the helplessness the complete and utter despair but I couldn't bring myself to care as his hand slipped down to rub slowly at my clit, his thrust becoming harder with every passing minute. It was completely fucked up of me to be handing over my virginity to someone that I had barely met, but I didn't care. I wasn't okay and I knew it.

Lifting up I sank my teeth back into the bite marks on his shoulder, to keep quiet as the tension that had steadily been building in my body broke and just like that I was cuming, harder than the first time that Damon had gotten me off.

"Damon." I moaned gently as he thrust his cock into me one last time, his body shaking as he reached his own completion. Damon licked his lips, his bright blue eyes cloudy as he looked up at me, a look of almost confusion written across beautiful features. Pushing my fingers back through damp black hair I bit my bottom lip. By not saying no, by giving into something that I shouldn't have I changed things, for the good or the bad I didn't know. I just hoped it didn't come back to bite me in the ass, but even as I hoped that, I knew it would.

**a/n- yeah no comment on this chapter, as I said things won't be all peaches and cream for our lovely little couple things are going to get really hard but more on that to come. Please don't forget to review cause well reviews= inspiration and inspiration= faster chapters. Until then.**

**-Jayden**


	4. The Sharpest Lives

**This alone, you're in time for the show  
>You're the one that I need<br>I'm the one that you loathe  
>You can watch me corrode like a beast in repose<br>'Cause I love all the poison  
>Away with the boys in the band<br>I've really been on a bender and it shows  
>So why don't you blow me a kiss before she goes?<br>Give me a shot to remember  
>And you can take all the pain away from me<br>A kiss and I will surrender  
>The sharpest lives are the deadliest to lead<strong>

The next morning I woke to the feeling of cool silk sheets against my bare skin and an arm wrapped possessively around my waist, the fingers stroking the skin of my hip. For a moment I panicked wondering what the hell had happened but then I remembered the night spent in Damon's arms and the mistake of letting him carry me up to his bed.

"Morning." He murmured as his lips stroked their way slowly along my shoulder. Sucking in a sharp breath I rolled over, coming face to face with Damon, his blue eyes bright and sparkling in the early morning light, a smirk curling its way across the corner of his lips. Blushing from the top of my head down to the tips of my toes I tried to shy away from him, but he was having none of that. Instead his fingers tangled in my hair as he pulled me back to him, his lips pressing firmly into mine, unconcerned with morning breath as he took my bottom lip into his mouth and sucked slowly at it, teeth grazing along the skin. Instantly my body was on fire, memories of the night before flashing through my head in rapid succession until my heart was threatening to break free of my chest, my body shaking with near desperate want for him. Damon rolled over with a groan, settling his narrow hips between my thighs as I opened my mouth wider, taking his tongue deeper, my nails set into his skin, wanting him as close as possible and then even closer still. A quick sharp tug of his hands in my head had my head tilting back, his teeth scraping a sweet line of pleasure laced pain down my jaw as I lifted my knees to cradle his hips better against me, all soreness from the night before a distant memory.

Curiosity getting the better of me I reached down, wrapped my hand around the length of his erection as his lips wrapped their way around my nipple in a soft suckle that had my back arching and my hand tightening. Damon groaned around my flesh, the vibrations making my body tremble with anticipation of what was to come. His fingers leaving my hair, Damon reached down to remove my hand from around his cock, instead directing my focus to his shoulder, the angry red bite marks from the night before calling my complete attention.

"Bite down beautiful." He murmured even as he placed the blunt head of his cock at my entrance, pushing in slightly. Hesitating to hurt him again I brushed my lips along the skin, but Damon had other plans, his fingers once more tangling in my hair to direct me, "Bite down now Elena." He commanded, and the second my teeth set down into his skin, his hips shifted, thrusting the entire length deep into my pussy with one smooth stroke. The pain was a sharp contrast to the pleasure stroking its way through my body as he set a slow but hard pace, my hips wanting to meet his thrusts, my mind unsure if I was doing things correctly. Damon swore, leaning down to sink his teeth into my neck as his hands drew my leg up and over his shoulder, pushing his cock deeper into my pussy with every stroke that he made.

The next few hours were a blur of different positions and toe curling bliss. Damon made sure I didn't have a chance to think, only to feel. Finally when I didn't think I could take it anymore, my body feeling like one giant nerve ending, Damon rolled away from me, his body glistening slightly with a light sheen of sweat, looking far more satisfied with himself then he should be looking.

Shaking my head I stretched, trying to get my breathing back under control, groaning with protest as my body tried to get itself working normally again.

"Jesus Damon." I whimpered, closing my eyes, giving up completely on moving anymore for fear of what it would do to my over sensitive body. Damon chuckled, his breath hot against my ear as his arm snaked its way around my stomach, to curl possessively against my side.

"I'm not where close to being done with you love…" he murmured, a shiver wracking its way down my spine as his lips brushed against the shell of my ear.

"What?" it came out a gasped breath, my body already winding up as I waited to see what he would do to me?

That's how the next few weeks went, my nights spent in Damon's bed, under him, over him, held by him, each night was different, and the days we spent hiding whatever was happening between us from everybody else.

The Monday that Jenna almost caught us was no different.

School was in session and had I had any thought I would have been in class, but Damon, with that smirk of his and the wicked gleam in his blue eyes had convinced me to stay home, again…not that it really took that much convincing.

"fuck." He groaned arching up, his fingers stroking over the base of my neck, pushing my hair to the side as he watched me.

Damon cocked an eyebrow before shaking his head and then there was a look of bliss crossing his features as I finally got past what little bit of shyness that I had left and wrapped my lips around the head of his cock. All i could focus on was the feelings: the smooth skin as it slid over my tongue, the slightly salty taste, the gentle pulses of his shaft against my tongue. The soft hum as I slid his shaft deeper into my mouth had his hands balling into fists at my sides, the moans that passed from his lips each time I'd come up to suck roughly at his head, all of it kept echoing back to me.

"Elena," he arched up, hands reaching to tangle back into my hair wanting to push me down as far as I could go, but terrified of choking or gagging me, considering how long it had taken to even convince me to do this… I pulled up a little, pink tongue sliding across bright red swollen lips as his bright blue eyes sought out mine. I sucked in a quick breath threw my teeth, stomach tightening in arousal, knowing that I was the one making him lose control and he knew it too, he knew what he was doing to me, he got off on it. I smiled before leaning down to blow softly across the head of his cock and I swear my stomach started doing flips, clenching in a way that I had come to love so much over the past few weeks that I had been with him, his eyes promising that he was close and then, it'd be my turn. I glanced down at his cock one more time before I leaned down and worked my lips back down his shaft until my mouth was pressed to his base.

He swore under my breath, trying to focus on anything else then the feeling, not wanting things to be over as quickly as they were going to be but as I felt that clenching in his stomach worsen I knew that there was no helping it.

"Lena…" was all the warning that he got out before I was swallowing trying my hardest to keep up with the cum that was pushing into my mouth. His jaw fell slack as he watched me swallow like I had been doing it for years, like I was made for it. I glanced up at me, eyes locking with his once more, needing his approval before I sat up completely, with a wet popping sound, tongue sliding over my lips, scared that I had missed something or made a mess of myself. "Jesus Christ."

Resting my head against his thigh I tried to keep my blush for him, but Damon had come to know me too well, and his fingers stroked their way over my flamed cheeks.

"Elena-" he began but the sudden slamming of the front door and the hurried click of heels on the wooden floor had the two of us snapping away from each other and Damon reaching for his jeans.

"Elena Jane Gilbert where the hell are you." Swearing I made a dash for the hallway as my aunts voice echoed into the living room.

"I'm here Jenna." She looked more than a little pissed as I came skidding into the entryway, my hair a mess from Damon's fingers and my eyes red from the tears that leaked from them the first few times that I had attempted to take Damon's cock into my throat before I finally got the hang of it.

"why aren't you in school?" she demanded her hands on her hips, "I know that I'm supposed to be the laid back one but you can't just take advantage like this Elena, you can't just be skipping classes whenever you want too."

Biting down on my bottom lip I looked down at the floor unwilling to look her in the eyes as I flat out lied to her.

"I'm sorry I've been thinking about my parents and it's been causing me to have a hard time, I just couldn't do it today." Jenna groaned and pushed fingers back through her hair before glancing down at the watch on her wrist.

"Today is the last day." She finally muttered still looking at her watch, " I need to get back to the university…are you gonna be okay?" nodding I shifted awkwardly from one sock clad foot to the other knowing the moment that the door shut behind her I would probably be naked and under Damon again.

"I'll be fine I promise." I muttered. Jenna nodded and turned back towards the door the anger seeming to deflate out of her body.

"Call me if you need anything." And then the door was closing behind her and Damon was slinking around the corner, his jeans hanging dangerously low on his hips, that wicked smirk of his, painted across his lips.

"Now where were we love?" He murmured skimming his lips around the curve of my neck as one hand pushed its way up the front of my shirt to cup my breast and the other slipped into my jeans, slinking down to press against my panties.

Swallowing I closed my eyes leaning my head back on his shoulder as his fingers plucked at my nipple through the material of my bra.

"You were gonna…mmph…" I whimpered turning my head to nip at his ear lobe. Damon smirked against my skin, his fingers pushing past my panties to draw lazy circles against my clit, the hand on my breast massaging the skin in a smooth movement.

"Come on love," He quipped, sliding his tongue in a line along my collar, "were the only ones here, I wanna hear you scream for me." And with that he plunged his fingers deep into my pussy settling quickly into a pace that had my toes curling in my shoes and my mind drifting off into lala land, pleasure being the only thing that I could comprehend.

"Mmm god I love you…" I murmured completely unaware of the words as I trust myself down against his fingers. Damon pulled away from me quickly, almost as if I had burned him, his eyes narrowed into slits as he moved around to the front of me.

"What did you say?" he demanded with a look as cold as ice.

"I love this." I corrected quickly, but the damage had already been done and Damon was looking at me with a look of disgust in his eyes.

"fuck." He swore, and then he was walking away from me, leaving me feeling dirty and completely used.

What had I done?

**A/n-so yeah all of the chapters are being completely done, make sure to check back even if you read the original story cause there have been some major plot changes and quite a few chapters added. As always thank you to everyone that has reviewed it is much appreciated. The next chapter should be up in a little while. If you see anything wrong with the chapter please let me know and I will fix it.**

**Until next time.**

**-Jayden**


	5. I Don't Love You

**Sometimes I cry so hard from pleading  
>So sick and tired of all the needless beating<br>But baby when they knock you  
>Down and out<br>It's where you oughta stay  
>And after all the blood that you still owe<br>Another dollar's just another blow  
>So fix your eyes and get up<br>Better get up  
>While you can<br>When you go  
>Would you even turn to say<br>"I don't love you  
>Like I did<br>Yesterday"**

I stood there feeling dirty and used, wondering what the hell had gone wrong when I realized that if I just stood there and let Damon walk away from me then I would never know what could have possibly been between us. And even though I had let the L word slip some part of me had to have meant it or it never would have come out. Turning on my heel I made3 a dash for the stairs, half convinced he had beat me to his bedroom already and locked me out, but the sharp clink coming from the living room told me differently. When I approached the entry way he was sitting in his favorite recliner, a glass of some amber colored alcohol resting in his hand as he stared at the fire, seemingly deep in thought. Cheeks flaring up my mind rushed through the look on his face as he had arched up in that recliner, her fingers tangled in my hair. But that wasn't the time nor the place for those thoughts, instead I needed to find a way to fix things, to make them okay again. Sucking in a sharp breath I gathered as much courage as I could, as little as that truly was and walked over to Damon, kneeling in front of him and placing my hands against his thighs.

"Now is not the time Elena." He warned looking down his nose at me before he turned his head to focus back on the fireplace.

"I need to know what I did wrong Damon," Letting out a slow breath I stroked my fingers slowly along his thighs, trying to keep him calm, though why he was mad I wasn't really sure, " I know you probably don't wanna talk to me right now but I need to know what I did wrong." Taking a long drink he stalled speaking for a few minutes.

"I don't do emotions Elena," He finally snarled when I could no longer take the silence and felt like I would go insane if I had to bare the emptiness of it any longer, "I don't love, I don't hate, I don't any of that Elena, emotions are complicated and something that I will have nothing to do with. You're insane if you think that you can just waltz your way into my life and suddenly change all that. It's just sex, nothing more than that nothing less, and if you think it was more than that then you're more naïve then I gave you credit for. A stupid little school girl with a pathetic little crush. Grow up." Feeling as if he had ripped my heart out of my chest I stood and took a deep breath, "Just go Elena, get outta my sight." He whispered, dismissing me like I was a child that had misbehaved and was being punished. Turning on my heel I ran, needing to get as far away from him as I possibly could.

* * *

><p>Caroline and Bonnie didn't ask questions when I called them in tears, instead they listened as I cried my heart out over a relationship that they hadn't known existed in the first place. After that first night they let me sulk, telling me that I had one night for each week we were together until I needed to pull myself together and move on.<p>

Two weeks later and I still hadn't gotten over everything that he had said to me and how much it had hurt me. My room was my self-proclaimed prison and I wouldn't have it any other way. I didn't wanna do anything, eating became a chore and most days I stayed in my pjs if not just flat out never got out of bed at all. It wasn't until Jenna and Ric got sick of watching me like that that they called Caroline and the true spiral into a self-destructive depression began.

"Hello?" I muttered curling myself into my blankets as I answered my phone for the first time in days.

"Get up I'm on my way to get you." came Caroline's all too chipper voice over the speaker.

"I don't wanna go anywhere Care," I whined rolling over and tightening my blankets around myself as if that could shield me from the world.

"I don't care. Get your ass outta bed; I'll be there in a few." And then she hung up on me, the soft beeping in my ear driving me insane until finally I hung up myself.

True to her word Caroline showed up a few minutes later, bursting through my bedroom door, a slinky dark green dress tossed over her arm and a pair of tall leather almost hooker like shoes hanging over her fingers.

"Come on, up, up, up!" she chanted tossing the clothes onto my bed before kneeling on my window seat and tugging open my curtains. "We are going to go out tonight and you are gonna find the hottest guy there and you are gonna flirt and you are gonna dance and you are gonna be happy god damn it cause enough is enough and Damon isn't worth you acting like this. By the time tonight is over you're gonna be thinking 'Damon who.'" Walking over to my bed she grabbed the covers at the bottom before yanking them off of me body with a self-satisfied smirk. I thought I had some chance at fighting her off, at figuring out a way to get out of going but then Bonnie walked into the room, a clear box held in her hands, the different kinds of make-up clearly visible and I knew that I had no hope.

The water of the shower was freezing cold and unforgiving, knocking me out of my stupor before I could really figure out what was going on. After that Bonnie and Caroline pulled and twisted me, slathering creams and various beauty products across my skin before I was deemed okay enough to leave the house with them, the dark green dress that Caroline had brought with her wrapped around my body in a way that was supposed to entice, the heels seeming to make my legs go on for miles.

The little club that Caroline was insistent that we were going to was two towns over where nobody would have a chance to guess that we were five years under age, especially with the three fake IDs that Caroline produced, curtsy of her trouble maker boyfriend Tyler. The music was shaking the walls when we first approached the hard thumps of the bass feeling like it was matching each beat of my heart in my chest – it was making me feel sick to my stomach. The bouncer barely spared us a glance when Caroline presented our IDs to him, instead pulling aside the velvet rope to let us in. the room was barely lit but the multi colored lights that moved and pulsed with the beat on whatever song was playing. Squeezing my hand Caroline dragged Bonnie and I over to the bar, ordering a round of shots with a flirtatious wink sent at the bartender. When the shots arrived I eyed the clear liquid unsure if I should really be doing this, the last time that I had drank my parents had died coming to get me from a party that I had no business being at.

"To Elena being single and a giant fuck you to Damon. Life is damn good and is gonna get a hell of a lot better." Caroline cheered holding up her shot glass. Ignoring everything in me that was screaming that I was making a giant mistake I knocked back my own short with a soft gasp, the burning feeling as the alcohol rolled down my throat and settled into my stomach almost comforting with its familiarity. Caroline smiled and knocked back her own shot before gesturing Bonnie to do the same, "to us girls." She smiled, motioning the bartender for another round of shots. I could already see how the night was gonna go after three shots and no end in sight.

"Come dance with me." I slurred a good few hours later, gripping Caroline's hand in my own as I tried to drag her away from Tyler who had showed up at some point during the night.

"Get Bonnie to do it." Caroline groaned, curling tighter into her boyfriend looking slightly sick, not that it would have surprised me, she had drank twice as much as Bonnie and I put together and I was already feeling the effects.

Rolling my eyes I decided to say screw them and find my own person, especially considering I couldn't seem to find Bonnie anywhere that I looked though I was sure that she was there somewhere. Swaying slowly to the beat a happy albeit drunk smile curving my lips I made my way over towards the other end of the club where I had seen a dirty blond haired man eyeing me for the majority of the night.

"Ello love." He smirked as I came stumbling towards him, probably making a fool of myself but not really caring in my drunken state.

"You're cute." I giggled, reaching up to twist my fingers into his slightly curly hair, my teeth sinking into my bottom lip as I watched him. He smiled, a molester looking smile- something that had I been sober would have looked frightening on him before curving his hand down around my hip.

"As are you love." He murmured leaning way to close for my comfort but I really could have cared less. The alcohol had loosened me up and I was feeling a hell of a lot better than I had in a very long time.

"What's your name?" I questioned still swaying slightly as his arm curved its way securely around my waist to hold me against his side.

"Klaus love." Smiling I lifted up onto my tiptoes, lips almost against his ear as a wicked thought pushed its way through my brain.

"Klaus…" I hummed, rolling his name around on my tongue before deciding that I liked it, "how would you like to help me forget someone." Klaus chuckled, a dark sound that sent shivers shooting up my spine, a warning that I should have taken into stalk.

"By the time I'm done with you love." He murmured stroking his finger down my cheek as he leered at me with a predatory grin, "you won't remember their name." Everything in my system warned me against him, that I was making a mistake that I might not be able to fix, as Klaus pulled me closer to his body, his hands stroking over my side. I just wish I would have listened.

**A/n- thank you to everyone that reviewed it is much so appreciated, the next chapter should be up soon and this is where things are gonna kinda really change from the original story. Until then, happy reading.**

**-Jayden**


	6. Honey, This Mirror Isnt Big Enough For

**A/n-sorry that this is up here guys but I wanted to explain something before we get to the chapter, there is stuff in here that I don't agree with but know a little bit about. When depressed and needing to get out of it most people tend to spiral and do stuff that they usually wouldn't do...keep that in mind as we go about the next chapter. As always thank you to everyone that reviewed they mean the world to me. To the person that asked if I like MCR the answer would be yes, however, I went through several bands before I decided to stick with this one. I usually use a song for inspiration when I'm writing simply cause I like to put said song on repeat and it sets the tone for the chapter for me. Okay enough with the prattling on, here we go the next chapter. Happy reading- Jayden**

**The amount of pills I'm taking, counteracts the booze I'm drinking and this vanity I'm breaking, lets me live my life like this and well I find it hard to stay, with the words you say Oh baby let me in Oh baby let me in Well I'll choose the life I've taken, never mind the friends I'm making and the beauty that I'm faking lets me live my life like this And well I find it hard to stay, with the words you say Oh baby let me in Oh baby let me in**

Klaus hooked his hands over my waist before slowly pushing me towards the bar, his fingers stroking slowly over my hips. Motioning over to the bartender he ordered me another drink before leaning to to press his lips to just below my ear, his breath hot on my skin.

"so love, who are we trying to forget?" he murmured stroking his hand higher up over my waist until it was resting just beneath my breast his thumb moving back and forth, my eyes fluttering as I tried to keep my wits about me, the alcohol driving my mind in all sorts of directions.

"Damon." I murmured arching my back slightly as his lips trailed slowly along the line of my neck. Klaus chuckled softly against my skin before turning me around and pressing his lips down into mine, his fingers slipping onto the back of my neck. Eyes slipping shut I let him kiss me, his tongue stroking along the seam of my lips, begging for entrance. Briefly my fuzzy mind jumped to Damon and how I couldn't believe that I was doing this to him but then his words echoed back at me sending a bout of fury through my body and I tangled my fingers in Klaus' hair and tugged him closer thrusting my tongue past his lips. Klaus groaned in appreciation, his fingers digging slightly into the skin of my neck his body pressing mine slowly into the rough edge of the bar. I barely registered as he pushed something small and slightly chalky into my mouth until I was swallowing what ever it was and pulling back to look over Klaus.

"what was that?" I questioned with a gasp. Klaus shook his head before reaching behind me for the drink that he had ordered me, a smirk curling over the corner of his lips.

"don't worry about it love." he chided me with a chuckle, "you said you wanted to forget and i'm going to make sure that you forget love." pressing the drink into my hand he tilted his head to look down at me. Cocking an eyebrow I let out a breath before taking a sip of the bright green drink. Grasping my hand he set the drink, with only a few sips taken by me back onto the counter and lead me back out onto the darkened floor of the club.

Thirty minutes later and I was feeling more then a little good, Damon completely forgotten as I ground my ass back against Klaus, my hand slipping up to curl around the back of his neck. Klaus growled slowly against my neck his fingers digging into my hips as he nipped slowly at the skin of my neck. I hummed completely content when all of a sudden Caroline was in front of me, her lips drawn into a frown her hands on her hips.

"Where the hell have you been?" she demanded with a glare at Klaus. Giggling softly I bit on my bottom lip with a soft moan, leaning my body back into Klaus I regarded her through half lidded eyes.

"you know here, there a little bit of everywhere." biting harder onto my lip I closed my eyes curling my body closer to Klaus, my mind running over the place and wondering how it was I had ever survived without him to begin with. Klaus chuckled against my ear, the sound sending sparks up through my body that I thought only Damon could give me. Guess I was wrong. Opening my eyes I reached forward to touch Carolines cheek with a smile, "i'm fine, youre fine everything is _fine_ just relax." I singsonged stroking my thumb across her cheek. "god I love you, youre like me best friend ever." Caroline tugged away from me, her lips thinning into a line as she watched me before her eyes went wide and she let out a slow breath.

"holy fuck!" she exclaimed grabbing my chin and tugging me head down until she could look me in the eyes, "youre high!" giggling slowly I shook my head and pushed my fingers back through my hair.

"i'm fine." I insisted again reaching up to touch her cheek once more, "stop being such a worry wart." caroline tugged out of my grasp once more her eyes narrowed as she stepped around me at Klaus.

"Did you do this to her?" she demanded, shoving at his chest, pushing him further away from me, the distance having a startling effect on my body. Klaus tilted his head to look over at me, completely ignoring Caroline but she would have none of that, her hands shoving at his chest, "hey jackass i'm talking to you, did you do this to her!" growling low in my throat I put myself between Caroline and Klaus, suddenly feeling super protective of him, needing her to understand that he hadnt done anything to me that I hadnt asked him too.

"go home Caroline, youre drunk, I'm fine and i'm where I want to be. If I need you i'll call." I snapped before grabbing Klaus' hand and heading towards the door to the club, "take me home Klaus."

* * *

><p>The next day I woke with the worst headache that I could have possibly imagined, my pulse thumping in my temple, all thoughts of moving making me want to vomit. Groaning I shifted, ready to roll over and go back to sleep or at least pray to die but then I realized that there was an arm wrapped around my waist and I wasn't going to be going anywhere any time soon. Settling myself back down I tried to relax, despite how much my body was screaming at me that I needed to shift to make myself more comfortable. Soon enough though my eyes were popping back open as I realized that there was an arm around my waist and i hadn't seen Damon in weeks.<p>

The room around me was unfamiliar as I looked around, the old fashioned Gothic high arched windows and the steel accents making it feel cold and unwelcoming.

"Good morning." The voice behind me spoke softly against my shoulder, the arm wrapped around my waist slipping up until a hand was brushing along the underside of my bare breast. Biting my bottom lip I tried to remember what had happened the night before but all I could remember was the sharp burn of alcohol as it slid down my throat and then after that, nothing. Sucking in a sharp breath I rolled over and came face to face with someone that I felt I should recognize but couldn't place in my memory.


	7. Demolition Lovers

**Hand in mine, into your icy blues And then I'd say to you we could take to the highway With this trunk of ammunition too I'd end my days with you in a hail of bullets I'm trying, I'm trying To let you know just how much you mean to me And after all the things we put each other through and I would drive on to the end with you A liquor store or two keeps the gas tank full And I feel like there's nothing left to do But prove myself to you and we'll keep it running**

"what the hell happened last night." I squeaked reaching for the blankets and tugging them up to cover my chest, my eyes growing wide. "I didn't..." groaning I reached up to push my fingers back through my hair, the fuzzy feeling in my head and the blank space where my night should be driving me insane with worry, "did I sleep with you?" I finally managed to sputter out as the guy looked down along my body.

"No love you didn't." He chuckled reaching up to push my bed mused hair away from my face, "when we got to my place you started stripping off clothes but nothing happened between the two of us." sighing in relief that I hadn't cheated on Damon like I thought I did I laid back down my head starting to spin...but then I remembered that there was no Damon to cheat on, the cruel words that he has said to me echoing back in my ears. Growling I rolled onto my back and buried my head into the pillows unwilling to just yet face what had caused me to toss all my morality aside and not only get drunk off my ass if the memories of shots with Caroline were anything to go by but also to take something that had been pushed into my mouth without knowing what the hell it even was. "Come on Love time to get up," my bed partner chuckled, a firm smack to my bare ass causing me to squeal before unceremoniously falling off the bed in my attempt to get away from him, "the day is young and your corruption is not yet complete." He grinned, this lopsided grin that would have been better placed on Damon's face before climbing out of the bed himself, his body clad only in a pair of bright blue plaid boxers. Groaning I laid my head against the side of the bed, wishing that the floor would open up and swallow me whole, my embarrassment at being completely naked in some strangers room almost completely forgotten as I tried to process what said stranger had said.

"i need to get home." I murmured closing my eyes my body still protesting as the room around me spun. The man chuckled, disappearing into the bathroom for a few minutes before returning a glass of water held out to me.

"There is time to go home later," he snorted as I greedily gulped down the water placed in my hands, not realizing just how thirsty I had been until the cold liquid hit my tongue. "I promised to help you forget your darling whats-his-face and I don't intend to let you out of my sight until that has happened love." I opened my lips to protest, the empty glass resting awkwardly on my bare thigh when the door to his room opened and I was scrambling to cover myself with the sheet, my cheeks stained bright red as a tall curvy blond walked into the room, her hips swaying as she tried to draw my bed mates eyes towards her.

"Are we still on for tonight, Klaus?" She cast her eyes over my body, her nose wrinkling in something akin to disgust, her body perching on the bed, "and is your...friend...coming with us." She cocked a perfectly arched eyebrow in my direction and the image of what I would have assumed was a bubbly head cheerleader shattered as the uber bitch came out. Bending down she picked up the dark green dress that I had worn the night before between two of her fingers, holding it away from her body like it might come to life and bite her before she regarded me, "Now that simply will not do." tossing the wrinkled dress back onto the floor she stood up and curled her fingers in a come hither motion before walking towards the door to the room, "we'll be ready in an hour Klaus, be ready for us by then." glancing back and forth between the two of them I didn't really know what to do much less what to say but then Klaus was shooing me away and closing the door behind me. Half way down the hall the blond was leaning against a door frame, her arms folded across her chest as she regarded me through narrowed eyes. "Another little junkie of my brothers..." pushing open the door she was leaning against she gestured me into the room. Swallowing I walked in, half wondering what she was going to do to me, but then she was shoving me onto the bed, the world starting to spin around me again with the sudden movement. Walking over to the side of the room she threw open a set of double doors and walked into a rather large closet lined with all sorts of clothing. her features wrinkling as she glanced over her shoulder at me I tried not to feel completely judged but then she was turning back towards her closet and tugging out dress after dress after dress and I resigned myself to the fact that I was just being paranoid and she wasn't really judging me, only trying to find something that she deemed worthy of me wearing. Growling in frustration she finally threw a pile of dresses at me, the material ranging everywhere from lace to leather and the length not even beginning to be decent.

"you want me to wear one of these?" I choked out holding up a slinky red number that was missing the back completely down to the ass and whose neckline dropped down to the belly button, a thin red string being the only thing to keep the two sides from baring all. She smirked and settled her hands onto her hip and nodded, her tongue darting out to moisten her bottom lip.

"no I expected you to clean the fucking house with them," she snorted, my dislike for her growing with every passing second. Swallowing at the slightly insane look in her eyes I set the red dress to the side and reached for a different one, the neckline and hemline getting worse and worse with each one that I passed. Finally as if she couldn't take it anymore the blond grabbed the red dress that I originally had held and chucked it at me. "this one." was all that she supplied before approaching the vanity in the corner and flipping on the lights surrounding the mirror. Standing there frozen I watched as she grabbed various items out of the drawers, lining them up on the counter before turning to glare at me, her lips thinned into a line. "are you daft! Put the damn dress on!" jumping slightly I briefly wondered why the hell I hadnt walked out on the psycho blond and her wacked out brother before deciding that I did truly want to forget Damon and everything that he had done and if I was going to do that then I would have to stick through to the end. Swallowing I tugged on the red dress,blanching when I realized just how exposed my body was going to be. Motioning me over I was pushed into the chair, a brush forcing its way roughly through my tangled and snarled curls, her lips pursed as she got to work making it look like I hadnt just woken up. Eyes growing wide I realized exactly how bad things must of looked this morning when she came in to talk with Klaus and quickly went about trying to correct her.

"i didnt sleep with your brother." I blurted cheeks stained red as I met her eyes in the mirror. She cocked an eyebrow a smirk curling the corner of her lips as she scanned her eyes down my body, the feeling of being judged wrapping its way around me once more.

"Sure you didnt." she quipped and that was that.

Klaus was silent in the back seat next to me on the way to where ever it was that we were going, his arm slung around my shoulder, the blond bitch or Rebekah as Klaus had introduced us was sitting in the front of the car next to Kol, their other brother. Refusing to think on anything for fear that my mind would not stop I stared out the window of the car until we pulled up to a bar just outside the city limits. Feeling almost a sense of deja vu I slipped out of the car and followed the siblings towards the bouncer, my fake ID already out and in my hands. Like the night before it wasnt hard to get into the builiding, this time however I didnt have the comfort of Caroline and Bonnie with me, instead it was with three strange siblings and I found myself wondering just how far over my head I had gotten into. Squeezing my hand Klaus lead me over to the bar and ordered me a drink, the corner of his lips curling onto a smile as he rested his hands on the bare skin of my lower back. Leaning forward slightly his lips brushed the skin of my ear as he spoke.

"time to let go love," he murmured his free hand coming up to trace his thumb across my bottom lip, "just take a deep breath and let go." thumb brushing slightly inside my lip he pushed the pill that he had concealed into my mouth and I was left with a powdery substance on my tongue and the choice to swallow or not. Remembering the feeling that I had had the night before I closed my eyes and swallowed- needing to feel the short release that the drug would give me and knowing that Klaus would be there to help me as my body was beyond my control. Eyes still closed I reached blindly for my drink, taking a hesitant sip as I remembered my head from this morning. Finally deciding that I could deal with the hang over I took a deeper drink only to jump slightly startled when Klaus' voice was right next to my ear once again. "you have someone staring at you love." eyes flying open I turned my head only to freeze in my tracks as I met ocean baby blue eyes that held me in my spot, a shiver wracking down my spine. Cocking an eyebrow his eyes slid down my body leaving me feeling more exposed then I thought was possible considering how trashy Rebekah's dress was. Taking Klaus' hand I shook myself out of my trance and lead him away from the bar and towards the middle of the dance floor, barely sparing the thought that it was Damon as I pulled Klaus closer to my body. His arms came down around my hips as he pulled me flush against his chest, his fingers dipping easily until the silky material to rest against bare skin. It should have been impossible to hear but the growl that resonated from Damon's throat seemed to echo in the loud room, his eyes narrowed into a glare as he stalked towards Klaus and me.

"Get your hands off of her." he growled, as Klaus leaned down to press his lips against the bare skin of my shoulder. Chuckling softly his hands slid lower to run across the tops of my thighs, my eyelids fluttering shut as the drug started to take its course.

"She's here on her own mate, go find yourself a different girl." Klaus gloated, my body shivering as he chuckled softly next to my ear, the drug doing strange things to me. Gasping in surprise as I was yanked forward my eyes shot open to take in Damon looking down at me, barely concealed fury kept in check.

"my girlfriend and I are leaving and if you know whats best for you, you'll stay the fuck away from her." Damon snarled curling a protective arm around my waist. To high to really care what was going on I giggled as I leaned into Damon's side, the black material of his shirt drawing my complete attention. "God Elena, what the hell have you gotten yourself into this time."

"I only gave her what she asked for mate." Klaus goaded with a leer, "she begged for every second of it so dont act like shes the victim here. She knew exactly what she was doing when she crawled into my bed last night." Damon swore as the last of his barely restrained control snapped, and just like that he was pulling away from me and swinging at Klaus, my protests falling on deaf ears. The first couple of hits didnt seem like anything but then the blood started flowing and it became clear just how badly they were laying into each other. Casting eyes at the people around me I silently begged someone to help, but then there was a sickening crunch of cartilage breaking before Damon was climbing off of Klaus and reaching for me.

"Stay away from her." he warned again, his hand slipping onto my lower back to guide me as Klaus clutched at a broken nose, his eyes narrowed into a glare that promised retribution when he got the chance. Glancing sideways at me Damon lead me towards the front of the club, his hand pressed firmly into the skin of my lower back. Swallowing I glanced back over my shoulder at Klaus and the look of murder that he was directing at Damon had my drug induced brain wondering what the hell I had gotten myself into.


	8. Its not a fashion statement, its a death

**This hole you put me in  
>wasn't deep enough<br>and I'm climbing out right now  
>you're running out of places to hide from me<br>when you go  
>just know that I will remember you<br>if living was the hardest part  
>we'll then one day be together<br>and in the end we'll fall apart  
>just like the leaves change in colors<br>and then I will be with you  
>I will be there one last time now<strong>

By the time that we reached the edge of the club I was on edge, my shock over Damon hitting Klaus slowly disappearing until I was furious at him for thinking that he could step into the middle of my affairs when he had so bluntly told me that I meant nothing to him. And girlfriend? Even the word made me feel disgusted with myself and with him. What the hell was he thinking, he had treated me no better than a common whore and then had the balls to turn around and call me his girlfriend like that would somehow excuse all of the horrible things he had said to me, the way that he had ignored me. Growling low in my throat I let everything build up until I was so mad I was seeing red. How dare he.

"Don't touch me!" I snarled whirling around to glare daggers at him, wanting to hit him to cause him pain for all the shit he had put me through. Damon cocked an eyebrow at me before he reached for my arm, shaking his head and muttering under his breath.

"Come on Elena, let me take you home…you're drunk and making a scene." Damon shook his head before his hand settled over my arm, making to lead me out of the club, "don't be a drama queen." Slapping Damon's hand away from me I narrowed my eyes at him my hands settling down on my hips as my lips thinned into a line. Scene? I could give him a fucking scene that would make his head spin.

"Drunk or not you have no fucking right to suddenly act like you give a rats ass about me!" I yelled, more than a little satisfied when passerby's turned to look over their shoulders at the two of us, oh he was going to regret calling me a drama queen if it was the last thing that I did. "I'm not going to play you fucked up little games anymore Damon, not this time around." Shoving his body away from me I cocked an eyebrow at him daring him to make any kind of move towards me, he would regret it if he did. "Now leave me the hell alone." Damon growled, the sound coming out almost animalistic before he was picking me up and tossing me over his shoulder, my legs flailing as I tried to get away from him. "Put me down!" kicking my legs I struggled to fling myself from his shoulder but Damon was having none of it.

"Stop squirming." He grunted out as I managed to land my knee into his chest with some surprising force. His hand on my thigh slipped slightly and seeing freedom if I moved enough to get him to drop me I started wiggling even more. "I said stop squirming." He snapped before his hand was whacking my ass with a resounding smack. Stilling I turned my head to look at Damon, completely flabbergasted that he would smack my ass the way that he did before my eyes narrowed into a glare that promised death the moment he released me. "You're drunk," he said as he walked us out of the club and towards his car, "I'm taking you home and that's final." And then he was dumping me unceremoniously into the passenger's seat of his car, his eyes daring me to make a move away from me. Scolding me like I was a child, finger pointed at me and everything he slammed the door behind him before walking to the driver's side and climbing into the car. Folding my arms across my chest I acted like the sixteen year old girl that I was and turned to look out the window, determined to show him that he was not the boss of me and give him the silent treatment, the proverbial drama queen as he had called me earlier. I was furious and I was going to make sure that he knew it by making his life a living hell.

Damon barely spared me a glance as he started the car and pulled out of the parking lot headed back towards the boarding house. Pulling my foot up onto the edge of the seat I continued to stare out the window, occasionally glancing his direction, not caring that with the way that my leg was up I was exposing myself to everything that we passed. Ha! That would show him how much damn control he had over me. Already the buzz that Klaus had worked so hard to give me was fading; the adrenaline from Klaus and Damon fighting drawing me deeper into my thoughts then the drugs should have allowed me to be. Wondering if I could manage to make it back to the club and back to Klaus I barely noticed that we were nearing the house until Damon was speaking to me.

"Elena?" Damon's voice was strained when we pulled into the circular driveway of the boarding house, his head turning to the side to look at me. "I did this for your own good; you're better then running around drunk in a bar and partying with men that you don't know." Cocking an eyebrow at him I curled my lips into a sneer that would have made Klaus proud before I pushed open the car door and slid one leg out, determined to have the last word before I booked it into the house.

"You're right." I murmured reaching over to stroke my hand down his cheek as I slid my other leg out of the car, ready to make a run for it, " I just fuck strangers instead…you're proof of that." And then I was climbing out of the car and slamming the door behind me. I was halfway towards the door, more drunk then I initially thought considering how much I had stumbled to get there when Damon caught up with me, his hand curling around my arm with bruising force, and whirling me around to look at him.

"What the hell is your problem?" he snarled his eyes boring holes it felt like into me. Yanking out of his grasp once more I shook my head and looked down over him.

"You caused the damage Damon." I snapped licking the corner of my lips before tilting my head, "now stand back and reap the rewards. I promise the show won't be boring… who knows maybe you'll completely break me by the end of it." And then I was walking into the house, uncaring that Damon was still standing there like I had hit him, his eyes drilling into the back of my head as I sought out the comfort of my bed.

**a/n- hello it's me! Sorry that this has been so long coming I've had the worst case of writers block ever and even now are not completely satisfied with this chapter…so don't be surprised if it gets changed in the near future. Anyways as always thank you to everyone that has reviewed it has made my day and truly acted like a muse for me! =) the next chapter should come a little easier and a hell of a lot sooner considering its already completely planned out. Yay for outlines. Until next time happy reading.**

**-Jayden**


	9. House of Wolves

A/**_n- I am so so so so so sorry that it has taken this long to get this chapter up. I promise I will keep going life and moving across the country just got hectic and yeah. Anyways as always thank you to everyone that was kind enough to review they really do mean the world to reading!_**

**_-Jayden_**

**you better run like the devil cause they're never gonna leave you alone**

**You better hide up in the alley 'cause they're never gonna find you a home**

**And as the blood runs down the walls**

**You see me creepin' up these halls**

**I've been a bad motherfucker**

**Tell yer sister I'm another**

**Go! Go! Go!**

**And say**

**What I wanna say**

**Tell me I'm an angel**

**Take this to my grave**

**Tell me I'm a bad man**

**Kick me like a stray**

**Tell me I'm an angel**

**Take this to my grave**

I had barely been in my room for thirty seconds and was working on stripping off the makeup that Rebekah had caked on me when he stormed in, his baby blues narrowed into a glare as he looked over me.

"What the hell is your problem."He snarled the corner of those beautiful lips of his curling up as he looked over me. "That stranger could have done anything to you Elena! You're drunk and high on God knows what do you really think you'd have a chance in hell of fighting him off if he wanted to do something to you?"

"He did it cause I asked him too Damon!"I yelled back my voice breaking everything starting to become blurry and my head pounding from holding back the tears that I didn't want him to have the satisfaction of seeing. Standing up I walked the few feet to where he was standing, ready to give him a piece of my mind but his next words stopped me in my tracks.

"What could be so damn bad in your life Elena that you had to resort to something like that. What makes you so special to think that you can do anything that pops into that pretty little head of yours, consequences be damned so long as you don't have to remember all your bullshit teenage drama." The sharp crack of my palm connecting with Damon's cheek took both of us by surprise, my fury over his words barely held in check.

"You have no idea what the hell you're talking about." I snarled slightly satisfied with the bright red hand print blooming across his pale cheek, " you've put me through hell and back Damon and all because I dared to say that I love you! Like love is such a horrible thing." Curling my arms around my body I sat down on the edge of my bed and tried not to think about the chaotic feelings forcing themselves through my body now that the alcohol and drugs had started to leave my system. Damon remained silent as he watched me, his expression unreadable, the clenched fists at his sides the only indication that he was angry at all. "If you wanted to hurt me, wanted to watch me break then congratulations Damon, you got your wish, you succeeded in breaking me and now I'm just done. If you even remotely cared about me you'll leave me the hell alone." Closing my eyes I turned my back on the man that I had given everything too, feeling more exhausted mentally and physically then any sixteen year old use a right to feel.

"Elena..." The flood creaked as Damon stepped forward but I was done, I knew that I could take no more without breaking down in front of him and I wasn't willing to do that wasn't willing to show him that emotion.

"Just go!" I whimpered pointing towards the door, praying to whatever god was out there that Damon would not argue with me for once. Only when I heard the door click closed behind him did I finally allow myself to break down, the tears falling harder then they had when my parents had died; my heart feeling like it was breaking in my chest. Curling into a ball I clutched my pillow to my chew and tried to remember a time when things were better, a time when I was still okay and wasn't a shell of what I used to be like I was now. Eventually I couldn't take it anymore, my eyes sore and my chest aching from crying so much, my body granting my sanctuary as I finally fell asleep.

The next morning I woke to a pounding headache and a body that felt like it had been run over several times by a semi.

"Rise and shine sleepy head." Caroline called cheerfully as she walked into my bedroom and tugged open the blackout curtains to let in the sunshine. Swearing at her I ducked under my covers, feeling slightly like a vampire as the bright lights burned my eyes. " a little birdie named Damon called me last night and said that you were gonna need a friend so I come baring gifts." The edge of the bed sank as she sat down, her hand shaking my leg, "if you come out from under the blankets I have something that'll help with that head of yours." Groaning I lifted the edge of the blankets slightly so I could look at her, my lips curled down into a frown. The damned curtains were still open and that's as far as I would be going until she closed them. Caroline snorted holding out a steaming mug of coffee towards me, knowing that I would never pass up the chance of caffeine. "So are you gonna tell me what happened?" She questioned, cocking an eyebrow at me after I had taken my first few swallows of coffee.

"Damon's a bastard." I muttered between sips of the scalding liquid. Caroline tilted her head to the side slightly as she regarded me.

"We already knew that honey, your point?"

"I never should have gotten involved with him." Coming out from under the covers now that the sun didn't feel like it was burning through my retinas I leaned back against my pillows, "it was a mistake ever trusting him, ever allowing myself to feel what I did." Caroline her head her hand resting on my shoulder with what I assumed to be a reassuring squeeze.

"Don't let him get to you darling." She murmured her hand rubbing slowly over my back, "he has a lot of problems and after everything that Katherine did to him it doesn't really surprise any of us... I mean how someone can be okay after that is beyond me." Caroline shook her head clearly lost in thought as her words kept repeating themselves to me. _What Katherine had done._

"What did Katherine do?" I questioned aloud even as my mind was screaming that it shouldn't matter what his past was considering what he had done to me.

"I really shouldn't..." Caroline began her eyes wide as she looked over me but then her inner gossip came out as it usually does when she has a piece of info that she can't wait to spill. Eyes darting around the room quickly to make sure that there was nobody around that could hear us she leaned a little closer to me. "A few years ago Damon was engaged to Katherine and then she...-" Caroline never finished her sentence cause a throat being cleared drew both of our attentions.

"I'd make sure you knew the whole story before you go spreading rumors Blondie." Damon drawled folding his arms across his chest, resting back against the door frame. "The only people who know what really happened is Katherine Stefan and I, everything else is just petty bullshit spread by the town gossips." He gave her a pointed look and Caroline flushed red, biting roughly into her lip before excusing herself and beating a hasty retreat. Letting out a slow breath I dared to meet Damon's piercing blue gaze.

"Then you tell me Damon." I challenged licking my lips, "tell me why you are the way that you are." I half expected him to give me a bullshit answer or completely ignore my question but instead Damon did that stupid eye thing that I had come to love and walked into my room, making himself comfortable on my bed, his gaze drilling into my own.

"Fine...but you won't like it."


	10. Blood

_**A/n-yay another chapter in only a few days! As always thank you to everyone that reviews/favorited this story it totally makes my day! This chapter is a little unusual as its told completely from the amazingly twisted mind of one Damon Salvatore. Anyways please don't forget to review and if you have any questions feel free to ask and I'd be happy to answer them. Until next time happy reading. **_

_**-Jayden**_

**a celebrated man amongst the gurneys**

**They can fix me proper with a bit of luck**

**The doctors and the nurses, they adore me so**

**But it's really quite alarming cause I'm such an awful fuck (Why thank you! )**

**I gave you blood, blood**

**Gallons of the stuff**

**I gave you all that you can drink and it has never been enough**

**I gave you blood, blood, blood**

**I'm the kind of human wreckage that you love!**

Elena sat there staring at me expectantly; her hands clasped together in front of her as she waited for me to start talking. Taking a deep breath I ran my fingers back through my hair. I didn't want to be having this conversation with her but I had said that I would tell her about Katherine and I wasn't one to go back on my word, no matter how much I wanted too.

"If we're gonna do this Elena then we're gonna do it my way." Licking my lips I sat back against her pillows, relaxing in the only way that I could while we had this talk, "you're gonna listen and not speak until I'm done. Okay?" Elena looked like she wanted to argue but instead she nodded and settled back against the pillows next to me, patiently waiting.

"Katherine Pierce was a family friend growing up. Her father and mine were best friends while our mothers were practically sisters until my mother died. Katherine was born a few years after my younger brother Stefan and even though Katherine and Stefan were closer in age Katherine wanted to be closer to me. She wanted to be with me and I couldn't understand it but I was happy. We started off as the best of friends and only later on in our teen years did that explode into an actual relationship. Katherine and I couldn't keep our hands off of each other, we were in love. When we graduated from high school I asked Katherine to marry me but told her that we would have to wait until I was in a stable job and could support her before we had the ceremony. Naturally our parents were thrilled that the two families could finally be joined and her parents completely agreed about me needing to be able to support a family before we tied the knot, my father however saw it differently. He couldn't understand why I wouldn't just marry her then, couldn't understand that I wanted to be able to give her the life that she was accustomed too." Taking a deep breath I closed my eyes and let the memories even though they were painful wash over me.

"Against Katherine's wishes I joined the military, knowing that it would provide the security that I needed to be able to raise a family and also hoping the save face with my father, the ex general. I did my time, spent four years in the service and Katherine as much as she didn't want me doing it supported me. She stayed with her family here and u did what I needed too, spending whatever leave time I had coming home to see her. I had leave for a week on Katherine and my anniversary and wanting to surprise her I told her that I wash able to get the time off of work. When I got home I stopped by her parents house before I went to her apartment. Her parents told me she was in school and were only too happy to help me surprise her, giving me a key to her apartment so that I could set things up while she was in class. I went all out...I wanted things to be perfect. I've never really been one of those overly romantic guys, that's always fell on my younger brothers shoulders, but Katherine was worth it so I made her dinner, god her roses, chocolates her favorite chick flick, the whole nine yards...nothing was too good for her. When everything was ready I just had to sit back and wait for her to get home from school. At a quarter to seven I heard a bump against the front door and assuming that it was Katherine getting home I lit the candles on the table and waited for her to come in. I was excited to be able to surprise her for once but in the end I was the one that was surprised." Elena's hand grabbing my own pulled my from the memories that I had tried for the longest to forget. Smiling slightly she squeezed my hand encouragingly before nodding, silently telling me that she was there, to keep going, so taking a deep breath i continued.

"When Katherine came into the house she wasn't alone, instead she was attached to my younger brother, devouring his lips, her hands in the process if pulling off his shirt and his hands clasped firmly around her ass. They were completely oblivious of me sitting at her dining room table staring at them as they continued to practically fuck in front of me. When I had seen enough I picked up the plate in front of me and dropped it to the table watching with satisfaction as it broke. The two of them sprang apart. At first they looked at me with nothing but shock on their faces and then that shock turned to guilt, well for my brother at least, on Katherine she looked like she was mad that she had been caught.

The fight that happened after that was horrible. Stefan kept trying to say that he didn't know that Katherine and I were still together and Katherine kept trying to place the blame on me saying that if I had never left none of this would have happened, but I didn't care. I swore and I yelled at both of them unwilling to listen to what either of them had to say, why would I? I was in pain and I wanted them to feel the pain that I was feeling. When Stefan left as Katherine and I were fighting I didn't give it a second though, he could have gone to hell for all I cared after what he did to me. While we were fighting Stefan lost it, the guilt over having been fucking around with my fiancé being too much to handle. He swallowed a handful of pills and waited for them to take effect. Before he could die though his roommate Lexi found him and called 911. My brother was admitted into the hospital and from there transferred to a psychiatric hospital where he still is. Katherine the heartless bitch couldn't care less what she did, she doesn't care that she ruined my relationship with my brother she doesn't care that she did any of that. I haven't trusted anyone since and I swore that I would never let anyone in again. Nothing good ever come from it."

The room fell into a deep silence and I half wondered if Elena had fallen asleep before she was throwing her arms around my neck and twirling her fingers into my hair.

"I'm so sorry." She murmured into the skin of my neck. Instantly my temper flared.

"I don't want your fucking pity." I snarled pushing her away from me feeling disgusted with myself for letting my guard down enough to tell her about my past.

"I don't pity you Damon." She whispered resting on her knees in front of me " I care about you and I'm gonna prove to you that I'm not like her, I'm not like Katherine." And with that she was leaning forward to press her lips into mine, the warm comfort of her body against mine half allowing me to forget the hell that she had put me through the last few days. Nothing had been fixed, far from it but as her tongue stroked along my bottom lip and her fingers tangled in my hair I decided I didn't care...I'd rather lose myself in her body then face my demons any day. Sliding my hand onto the back of her neck I thrust my tongue past her lips and tugged her body closer to mine, welcoming the distraction. Elena's hands fumbled with the buttons on my shirt as she ground her body down into mine, and just like that I was lost.


	11. Summertime

**A/n- as always thank you to everyone that has reviewed I very much so appreciate it. This chapter kinda came outta the blue and wasn't part of the outline so yeah I have no comment except happy thanksgiving! Anyways please remember to review they keep me motivated and until next time happy reading. **

**Cause if you stay**

**I would even wait all night**

**Or until my heart explodes**

**How long?**

**Until we find our way**

**In the dark and out of harm**

**You can run away with me**

**And you can write it on your arm**

**You can run away with me**

**Anytime you want**

The room fell into a deep silence after Damon stopped talking. I could hear the anguish in his voice could feel the pain radiating off of him as we sat there.

'Don't just sit there do something' my mind hissed at me even as I was throwing my arm around her neck and curling my fingers into the curls at the name of his neck.

"I'm so sorry." I murmured into the skin if his neck, wanting him to know that I didn't blame him for the way that he was with the hell that he had gone through. Katherine was a bitch and a half and she deserved whatever hell she got after what she had done. Under me Damon tensed up.

"I don't want your fucking pity." he snarled pushing me away from him, his beautiful blue eyes narrowed into slits as he regarded me with disgust. Shaking my head I tried to think of a better way to explain what was going through my head, I needed to fix things even if It would only be slightly so.

"I don't pity you Damon." I whispered resting on my knees in front of him, "I care about you and I'm gonna prove to you that I'm not like her, I'm not like Katherine." And with that I was leaning forward to press my lips into his, needing to feels him, needing to prove him in any way possible that I wasn't like her. At first he didn't respond, his lips slack against mine, my confident sinking with each second that passed so with a last desperate attempt I slid my tongue along his bottom lip and curled my fingers into his hair...and just like that Damon came to life. His tongue thrust it's way past my lips as his fingers gripped the back of my neck tugging my body closer to his. My legs ended up straddled on either side of his hips, the proof of just how much he wanted me pushing up against my core. Sucking slightly at his tongue my fingers went to the buttons on his shirt, hating that the material was in the way of me being able to feel his skin against my own. My hips ground down against his erection on their own accord, my subconscious screaming that I make things right with us that I needed Damon, needed his body against mine needed his cock in me. Whimpering softly I pushed the soft material off his shoulders the second that I finished unbuttoning it. Damon ripped his lips away from me and looked down my body, eyes dilated breathing ragged. His hands settled down on my hips, rocking my pantie clad core down against his jeans, the red scrap material of Rebekah's dress pushed up my hips with each smooth roll. Muttering something under his breath one of Damon's hands left my hips and tugged the material at my breast aside so his lips could latch onto my nipple. Arching forward into his mouth I slid my hands down the front of his chest and down to the button on his jeans, not allowing myself to think about it as I popped the button. Damon nipped at my chest, tugging slightly at my nipple with his teeth and just like that I didn't care about stripping him or myself I needed him in me. Now.

"Fuck." I whimpered out hands tugging the zipper of his jeans down impatiently. Drawing his cock out of his pants I shifted onto my knees and pushed my panties to the side.

"Elena..." Damon started his hand on my hip squeezing slightly to steady me. Shaking my head I licked my lips and resting one hand up onto his shoulder to give myself leverage.

"No waiting, I need you." I managed to get out before I was sinking down onto his cock, his length filling me completely. Damon leaned back slightly, a low groan rumbling from deep in his chest, his hips snapping up slightly. Sliding my hand off of his shoulder to settle on his chest I shifted my hips slightly, moaning softly at the familiar feeling of his cock deep in my pussy. Swallowing I lifted up slightly only to sink back down onto his cock once more, biting down on my bottom lip as he sank deep. Damon swore apparently even more impatient then I was, his hands sliding down onto my thighs as he flipped me onto my back. Drawing my leg up onto his hip Damon pulled back until only his head was left in my pussy before surging forward in one sure thrust.

"You are mine." He growled out, punctuating each word with a rough thrust of his hips that had me seeing stars.

"Yours." I agreed in a whimper my hands scratching tracks down his back. Damon swore again his hand pulling the leg on his hip up higher as his thrusts got harder, his pace faster. "Damon..." Leaning down Damon pressed his lips roughly into mine, his tongue mocking the motions of his hips almost like he was trying to shut me up. Pulling back he shook his head and shifted to his knees, tilting my hips up as he thrust into my pussy at a different angle, the small change making all the difference. Head tilted back, my body arching, I came, my lips parted in a silent scream as the world around me went black.

When I came too Damon was laying next to me, his fingers stroking over the marks he had left on my hips. Groaning I shifted my body, the delicious pulsing from my pussy causing me to squirm slightly.

"Jesus Damon." I murmured reaching up to push his hair away from his face. Damon smirked doing that stupid fucking eye thing that he does, the look sending sparks through my body. Reaching up he copied me brushing my own hair back, the look on his face one of adoration and dare I hope it, love? Lifting up I pressed my lips gently into his, the rough treatment for earlier almost completely absent as I pulled his body up on top of mine. Already he was ready to go but this time around it was slow and sweet not the quick rough fuck we had had earlier. Damon's breath against the skin on my neck as he lazily thrust against me sent my heart into a fit, the rapid beating reminding me that this wasn't just any man I was letting fuck me, this was the man that I loved, and that changed things. Later on when all was said and done his head rested on my chest and my hand played in his hair.

"I've missed you Elena." He murmured like it was some deep confession and for him I knew that it was.

"I miss you too." I whispered back even as he started to doze, my mind shifting a hundred different thoughts rapidly through my brain. But even as I over thought things one stood out among the rest, I would not be like Katherine I would do everything that I could to keep Damon happy and to make sure that I never hurt him.


	12. Drowning Lessons

**Drowning lessons **

**These hands stained red**

**From the times that I've killed you and then**

**We can wash down this engagement ring**

**With poison and kerosene**

**We'll laugh as we die**

**And we'll celebrate the end of things**

**With cheap champagne**

**Without, without a sound **

**And I wish you away**

**Without a sound**

**And I wish you away**

Damon and I laid like that for hours, my fingers stroking through his curls as he slept on peacefully, completely oblivious to the inner turmoil I was facing. Damon and I had put each other through hell over the last little bit and it wasn't exactly like two rounds of good...okay amazing is more like it...sex could magically make things better. Letting out a slow breath I tried to calm my racing thoughts knowing that it was doing me no good to worry about something that I couldn't exactly fix while he was sleeping. Just as I was starting to settle down I heard the front door open and knew that the small peaceful moment that I had had with Damon would soon be shattered and sure enough as soon as the door slammed closed I could hear my aunt on the stairs.

"Elena Jane Gilbert! You get your ass down here right this second young lady!" Jenna yelled and from the sound of her voice I could tell she was being serious, "you have five minutes before I'm coming in there!" Damon groaned in protest as I rolled him off of my lower body and onto the free side of the bed. Jenna didn't know about Damon and I yet and if I had it my way she wouldn't be knowing any time soon, she'd probably kill him if she knew. Swearing under my breath I grabbed a robe from the back of my closet door and tugged it on, knowing that I wouldn't have enough time to get dressed before Jenna came up, and walked out the door and down the stairs to meet her.

"Where the hell have you been these last two nights." She demanded the moment that I stepped into the living room, her hands settled on her hips as she glared at me, "I know that I'm supposed to be the fun laid back one and all but even I have a problem when my sixteen year old niece doesn't come home!"

"We'll Bonnie, Caroline and..." I began already stumbling over my words. Jenna's lips thinned as she folded her arms across her chest, one of her eyebrows cocked.

"Don't you dare blame those two girls for something that you did completely on your own Elena Jane." She snapped at me, making me feel at that moment like a scolded five year old. "I don't want your bullshit I want the truth." Finally after a few moments of silence where I tried to come up with a better story she reached up to pinch the bridge of her nose, "You know what, I don't care what you did. You're grounded until further notice Elena, go to your room." Letting out a slow breath I didn't argue but instead took my punishment. It was better if Jenna never knew about Klaus and everything that had happened with him and I. I couldn't have been downstairs more then thirty minutes but by the time that I got back to my room my bed was empty and the cold state of my covers indicated that Damon hadn't been in my room for some time. Shedding my robe I raised up onto my tiptoes and stretched my muscles before padding quietly over to my closet in search of clothes, only then would I go searching for Damon and drag him back to bed with me.

Pulling on my favourite pair of sweatpants and a tank top I made my way down the hall towards Damon's room. Knocking softly I paused to wait for a response before turning the handle and stepping into his room. At first glance he was no where to be found but then I heard the soft pitter patter of water behind the bathroom door and knew he was in the shower. Shaking my head slightly in disappointment I briefly considered stripping off my clothing and joining him, but the yawn forcing its way forward was saying I was too tired for what would inevitably turn into rounds three and four. Turning on my heel I stalked back towards my room and climbed into bed hoping that at any point Damon would join me, but he never did come.

The next morning I woke to a sore body and a feeling of dread curling in the pit of my when I could take it no longer I climbed out of bed and made my way down to the kitchen. Caroline in all her cheery early morning person glory greeted me with a smile before motioning towards the coffee pot and telling me to help myself. Muttering a thanks under my breath I tried not to let my mind drift to much to the feelings of dread in my stomach. Sitting down I went through the normal motions on breakfast, distracting myself with Caroline's constant chatter about some fight that her and her boyfriend had gotten into. Pouring myself a second cup of coffee I leaned against the counter half listening to her again half training my eyes towards the door, waiting for the moment that Damon would walk in, knowing that the feeling in the pit of my stomach would disappear the moment that I saw him.

"Jesus Christ you're still here?" For a brief moment I had turned my attention towards Caroline and during that second the woman of my nightmares had walked into the room. Katherine Pierce smirked as she leaned against the doorframe her arms folded across her chest, pulling the material of her shirt taut. Swallowing I tried not to let her sudden appearance bother me but then Damon walked into the room behind her, his hair wet and his chest bare and it wasn't hard to put two and two together, especially with her wet hair and what I was coming to recognise as one of Damon's shirts on her body. Feeling like my stomach was going to fall out unless I got out of there I struggled to keep my composure.

"Thank you for last night love." She purred lifting up to press bright red lips into Damon's cheek. Silently I begged him to look at me to say something- anything that would reassure me that I was jumping to the wrong conclusion but Damon would barely look at me as he half smirked at Katherine.

"Any time." He answered his hand going to her waist as he moved past her. Feeling like my heart was breaking I tried to set my mug on the counter before making my way as fast as I could out of the kitchen, barely noticing as the mug slipped and shattered on the floor and Caroline called my name. I just had to get out of there, I couldn't be there any more.

A/n-nobody kill me! I promise there will a happy ending my characters just have to go through hell before I will let that happen. Anyways the next chapter will be up rather quickly and then after that things are gonna change, but you'll just have to wait and see cause I won't be giving any hints. That being said is bother chapter will be added for Cheerios should anyone be interested. As always thank you to everyone that reviewed its always appreciated and helps to keep me motivated with writing and churning out new chapters. Please don't forget to review and until next time happy reading.


	13. Thank You For the Venom

**Thank you for the venom**

**So give me all your poison **

**And give me all your pills **

**And give me all your hopeless hearts **

**And make me ill **

**You're running after something **

**That you'll never kill **

**If this is what you want **

**Then fire at will **

"I can't believe you, you fucking bastard." Caroline shrieked as I tried to escape from the feeling of sinking in my chest. The sharp crack of skin hitting skin echoed behind me as I finally managed to get towards the stairs, unable to see clearly past the tears streaking down my cheeks. Katherine, of all people it had to be Katherine. Sinking down on the stairs I closed my eyes and hunched forward burying my head between my hands as I struggled to breathe. "Oh honey." I hadn't realised that Caroline was in front of me until her fingers were resting on my arms pulling me into a hug. Sucking in a breath in sharp gasps I tried to control the sobs that were racking my body the feeling of my heart breaking making me wish that I had Klaus and his cure all forget me drugs. "He's not worth it sweetie." She cooed as her fingers stroked my back, "you can do so much better then being treated like that." Swallowing I pulled back from her and wiped at my eyes.

"I need a moment." I whispered pulling myself slowly to my feet and starting up the stairs. Caroline stated after me looking lost in her thoughts as I rounded the corner. The door to my bedroom had barely closed behind me before I was sinking to the floor, the feeling of hopelessness overwhelming in its intensity my mind screaming at me that I couldn't do it anymore.

Crawling forward slightly I grabbed at the bottom drawer of my dresser, tugging it open my hands reaching for the underside of the wood, half satisfied when I felt the cool metal taped there. I hadn't needed it for months not since Damon had come into my life, things had gotten better I didn't need that escape anymore but just like that everything came rushing back and I needed that sense of control once more. Despite having been kept there for months it came away easily, the shiny silver seeming more and more appealing the longer that I looked at it. I glanced at the door briefly wondering if I should lock it before deciding that I didn't care if Damon saw the damage that he did to me and slipping down to sit next to my bed I started to calm down. I stared at the blade in my hand for a few minutes before holding up my arm, eyes scanning over the skin, deciding on the best part, the easiest part to conceal. Sliding the blade between my teeth to hold it for a moment I reached for the bottom of my shirt and tugged it off, knowing where I would start and hating myself for it. It felt good, the first slash across my chest, ruining the marks that Damon had put on my skin the night before, ruining what was his, wanting, craving, to do more than just the minimal damage that I knew I was going too. The first few slashes were the hardest, but the dark red was seductive and soon enough I was barely hesitating as I slide the blade over fresh unmarked skin, wanting the release, the pleasure almost, as it helped me forget. It was hard getting to the bathroom when I decided I was done red steadily running down my chest and my arms as I stumbled slightly into the small room, leaving spots of blood on the floor as I walked. The water stung, another welcomed feeling, as it washed away all proof of what I had just done. I let out a slow breath leaning back against the tile, a small laugh bubbling up from my lips as I watched the pink water swirl the drain before disappearing from sight.

I sat on my bed wrapped in a blanket, the cuts over my body cleaned and hidden from view for the moment. For a few hours I sat in silence, trying to ignore what was happening and the sick feeling that I had in the pit of my stomach before I was reaching for the phonebook under my desk. It took three times of dialing the number and hanging up before I was able to actually bring myself to sit there and wait until they answered the phone.

"Fell's Church Family Counselling, this is Jude speaking, how may I help you." I let out a rough breath closing my eyes, a deep breath leaving my lips as I tried not to let the tears flow. I cleared my throat.

"Is Dr. Fell in?" I finally managed to croak out, knowing that if anyone was going to be able to help me it would be her.

"Hold on just one second." And then there was the stupid elevator type music playing over the speaker. It felt like an eternity before she picked up the phone, her soft alto echoing over it.

"Hello?"

"Hey Dr. Fell, its Elena Gilbert can I ask you a favor." The line was silent for a few minutes.

"What did you have in mind Elena?" I swallowed squeezing my eyes shut trying to keep my voice from cracking.

"Can I get Jeremy's number, or do you have a way that I could get in touch with him…"I swallowed clenching my fists, "I just really need someone right now." She sucked in a sharp breath and I could practically hear the gears in her brain working.

"You know Elena I'm really not supposed too." She finally muttered. I shook my head as the tears started to escape my eyes.

"Please…" I mumbled with a small sniffle. She let out a breath before she was muttering a number under her breath and I was scrambling to get a pen.

"Starr residence." I let out a rough breath as I heard Jeremy's voice echo through the speaker of the phone, tears filling my eyes once more.

"Jere?" I whispered the word and could hear his gasp, my eyes squeezing shut.

"Lena? Is that you?" I made a noise that he must have taken for a yes, "what's wrong are you okay?" I swallowed and shook my head before muttering.

"Not at all, can I see you?" Jeremy went quiet for a few moment before letting out a breath.

"Give me a sec." He was gone for no more than five minutes but it still had me on edge. "Give me your address and I will be there as soon as I can…do you want me to stay for a few days or…" He trailed off and I swallowed once more.

"Please." I whimpered out pathetically feeling like I was weak as my younger brother tried to comfort me over the phone.

He took down my address assuring me that he would be there in a few hours and hanging up the phone.

"Thank god." I muttered before closing my eyes and lying back on my bed feeling like I could finally breathe again.

**A/n- as always thank you to everyone that reviewed it means a ton for me. This is the last chapter that's going to follow the original plot line till a lot closer to the end, there will still be a second story and it will still be told through Damon's point of view but its going to be changing a lot. Anyways that being said this book has about 3 or 4 more chapters left and they will have a happy ending eventually I promise. Please don't forget to review they keep me going and encourage me to write. Until next time happy reading.**


	14. Astro Zombies

**With just a touch of my burning hand**

**I'm gonna live my life to destroy your world**

**Prime directive, exterminate**

**The whole fuckin' race**

**And your face drops in a pile of flesh**

**And then your heart, heart pounds**

**Till it pumps in death**

**Prime directive, exterminate**

**The whole fuckin' place**

The reassurance that Jeremy was coming was enough to help me settle down and close my eyes, body curling up as I started to drift.

"Elena?" The shaking of my shoulder brought me out of my disturbing dream only to peer into the baby blues that had been haunting my nightmares. Scrambling away from him in my half asleep state I tried to put as much distance between Damon and I as I could.

"What are you doing in here?" I demanded voice gravely from sleep. Damon sighed and shifted his weight on the edge of my bed looking uncomfortable.

"You were screaming in your sleep Elena." Damon cocked an eyebrow at me folding his arms across his chest as he settled into a defensive pose, "I was seeing if you were okay." Rollin my eyes I mirrored his stance folding my own arms across my chest.

"Like you really give a rats ass." I snarled daring Damon to deny it but his attention wasn't focused on my words, his eyes were narrowed at my arms instead.

"What the hell did you do?" He snapped grabbing my arm and tugging away from my body his hands pushing up the sleeves of my shirt so he could see the bandages all that better. Yanking my arm away from him I tried not to wince as the barely scabbed cuts broke up once again the sting a sharp reminder of everything that had happened. Damon growled as he tugged me forward, peeling the bandage slowly off of my arm to reveal the angry red looking cuts, the blood slowly starting to bead before trickling down my arm slightly.

"It's none of your business." The excuse was weak and I knew it but still I spat out the words, drawing my arm back and tugging down my sleeves down over my arms to hide everything from sight.

"Do you have a death wish is that what this is?" He growled out leaning down so that he was over me, his arms boxing me in his breath hot on my face. Drawing my lips into a thin line I shook my head and narrowed my eyes.

"What I do is none of your concern after what you did to with her Damon." I shot back leaning back on my bed even further. Damon growled low in his throat, the sound sending shivers up and down my spine and causing my body to clench in need. My mind may have hated him because of Katherine but my body sure as hell still wanted him.

"Everything you do is my concern Elena," He snarled out leaning closer to me, his lips mere inches from my own. "You are mine, I told you that yesterday."

Scoffing I shook my head and went to tell him exactly where he could shove his words when suddenly his lips were on mine and his fingers were twining in my hair, holding me in place. Stunned slightly it took me a moment to realise what was happening and Damon took my not pushing him away as an invitation, his tongue easily parting my lips and pressing into my mouth, stroking along my own tongue and demanding that I respond. Hands reaching up to clasp as his shoulder I struggled with wanting to push him away and pull him closer all in the same breath. Damon groaned and pushed forward his knee pressing between my legs as he tugged slightly at my hair, tilting my head back how he wanted it so he could thrust his tongue in deeper. I was half tempted to lay back to tug him over me and get lost in his body again like I knew I would but then Katherine popped into my head and I was shoving Damon away from me with all the strength that I had. Damon looked dazed as he stared at me, his lips swollen from being pressed against my own.

"Elena-"

"No!" I snarled standing up and advancing on him, "I forgave you yesterday and the second that I did you went and fucked her!" Pushing my hands over and over against his chest I shoved Damon further away from my bed, away from temptation, " I will not be making that mistake again, I won't be the idiot who takes your pretty words and spreads my legs because of them."

"Elena..." He began holding up his hands in surrender but the anger had built too much and I was not going to let him get a word in edgewise.

"No Damon!" Walking over to my door I yanked it open and pointed toward the hallway, "get out and stay the hell away from me!" Damon shook his head and tried to come near me his baby blues pleading with me to listen.

"It's not what you think, Elena I lo-"

"Don't you dare!" I had had enough and he was going to know it too. Damon shook his head and reached for me once more, more quite able to understand that it was in his best interest to leave. Before I knew what I had done Damon's head was snapping to the side and my palm stung from where it had connected with his cheek. "Just get out." The last part came out pathetically, sounding like I had the weight of the world on my shoulders and honestly I was tired, emotionally and physically drained.

"Elena?" My brother's voice coming from the door way drew Damon's and my attention away from the fact that I had just slapped him and from the look on Jeremy's face you could tell that he had been standing there for quite some time. "Is this a bad time, I could come back later."

"Damon was just leaving." I didn't bother to look at Damon as I said the words, couldn't bring myself to look at him for fear of the feelings that it would draw out, stuff that I wouldn't be able to handle just yet if I did. Damon paused to look at me when he got to the door before shaking his head and walking down the hallway. Sitting down on the edge of my bed I took as big of a breath as I dared least I break down sobbing once more. I was pathetic. Jeremy looked like he was halfway to the point of wanting to kill Damon when he came and sat down next to me, his arms wrapping around my shoulders and he didn't know any of the story.

"So you wanna tell me what that was all about?" He questioned softly rubbing my shoulder. Swallowing I leaned into him and closed my eyes.

"I screwed up big time Jere." It came out sniffled sounding but once the words were out I couldn't take them back so instead I sat there and told my little brother all about Damon and everything that I had done.

**A/n- as always thank you to everyone that reviewed for me it really does make my day. As I said last authors note I do promise that the story will eventually have a happy ending. The next chapter should be up in the next few day. Please don't forget to review cause reviews= inspiration and inspiration = longer faster chapters. Until next time happy reading. **


	15. Under Pressure

**Under Pressure**

**(Written by David Bowie and Queen covered by my chemical romance)**

**Insanity laughs under pressure we're cracking**

**Can't we give ourselves one more chance?**

**Why can't we give love that one more chance?**

**Why can't we give love give love give love?**

**Give love give love give love give love give love?**

**Cause love's such an old fashioned word**

**And love dares you to care**

**For the people on the edge of the night**

**And love dares you to change our ways**

**Of caring about ourselves**

Jeremy patiently listened staring at me in shock as I told him everything. Caroline and Bonnie deciding that I needed to lose my virginity, seducing Damon, telling Damon that I loved him when it was supposed to be just sex, Klaus, the alcohol, the drugs, going back to Damon and finally Katherine. He sat there for the longest time looking at me like he didn't know who I was and wondering what I had done to his sister.

"I don't know what you want me to say Elena." He finally confessed after we had say there in silence for the longest time. Chewing on my bottom lip I shook my head.

"You don't have to say anything Jere I just don't know what to do." And that was the honest truth, I felt completely and utterately helpless- the man that I loved had not only not loved me back but fucked his ex girlfriend that he hated too. Reaching up to wipe angrily at my eyes as I realized that once again I was crying I vowed then and there that I wouldn't shed another tear over Damon, there would be nothing left of me if I did. Jeremy shook his head before wrapping his arms around my shoulders and drawing me into his body, offering comfort to me in only the way that my brother could. Curling into him I felt slightly guilty, the first that that I had seen my brother since we had both been put into the system after our parents had died. "I think- "He started again after we had been like that for some time, " I think you need to talk to him, hear his side of the story. As much as I wanna kill the fucker myself for what he did to you there has to be a reason behind it, so let him explain ad then I'll kill him." Jumping to my feet to give Jeremy a piece of my mind I stumbled slightly the floor under me tilting as the world spun. "Are you okay?" Jeremy was on his feet reaching for my arm, his face a look of concern, " you look a little green." Nodding I sucked in a slow breath and prayed that the spinning would stop before I vomited.

"Just stood up to fast," I admitted weakly, "I'm just a little dizzy that's all." He looked skeptic before nodding and sitting down again.

"I meant what I said though I really think that you should hear his side of the story before you pass final judgement. If you really love Damon like you claim you do then you owe that to him and yourself." Shaking my head I curled my arms around my stomach as the spinning feeling finally subsided.

"I really don't wanna hear what he has to say Jere...what am I going to do if hurting me, if playing with my head was his goal all along." Jeremy shook his head and I started to understand just how much he had grown up since our parents had died, the voice of reason when I had been nothing short of stupid.

"If anything just talk to him so you can say goodbye." Jere finally murmured with a sigh his hands pushing back through his hair showing me just how frustrated he was with me. Nodding I liked my lips resigned to having to go look for him, I needed closure and then I would move on with me. "I talked to my foster mom before I came and she said that you're welcome to stay with us until you get yourself on your feet if that'll help." Nodding I threw my arms around my brothers neck unable to tell him just how much he was helping me, how much he was saving me from not only Damon but myself as well. "I'll pack a bag for you, go do what you need too, I'll meet you in the foyer when you're done."

Finally pulling away from him I squared my shoulders and walked towards the door to my room. Damon was in the living room when I finally found him, the familiar crystal tumbler clasped in his hands as he stared at the fireplace. Walking forward I knelt before him, the memory of our first fight springing to the front of my mind as I laid my hands against his knees.

"We need to talk." I let out a slow breath and tilted my head to look up at him, bracing myself for everything that was going to be said.

"I tried to talk to you Elena and you slapped me, I think the time for talking is well past over." He sounded completely devoid of emotion as he spoke, not even bothering to look at me, his beautiful features that I had come to love so much drawn into a look of complete indifference.

"Then listen." I said with a sigh, swallowing I closed my eyes and let it out. "I love you. The first time I tired to tell you that you rejected me and told me that you don't do emotions and instead of listening to that, cutting my losses and giving up I held onto the insanely childish notion that someday you would magically change and love me back. The thing was I shouldn't have been trying to change you and I know that now cause if you love a person you love them no matter what, flaws and all. I still love you, I never stopped loving you but you've hurt me and I don't know if I'll be able to forget that..."

"Elena..." Damon began but I held up my Hand to stop him. I needed to get all the way through what I was saying or I never would finish telling him.

"Let me finish. Katherine was the final straw for me , I could handle everything but that. My brothers' family has offered to let me stay with them and I'm going to take them up on it, I need to be okay again if only for me..." Lifting up slightly I pressed my fingers to his jaw and gently pressed my lips into his, eyes brimming with tears, "goodbye Damon." Taking a deep breath I climbed to my feet and cast one last look at Damon before walking towards the foyer.

"I love you too Elena."

Pausing mid-step I wondered if Damon had actually spoken before deciding it must have been my imagination, Damon had told me he didn't do emotions, and it would take more then just me to change that. Jeremy was waiting right where he said he would be, my bag in his hands.

"You ready to go?" He questioned turning towards the front door. Nodding I grabbed my jacket off of the holder in the foyer and pulled it on.

"Let's go."

Andie, Jeremy's foster mom was extremely kind to me and Jeremy was lucky to have someone like her to take care of him. The guest room had been fixed up for me by the time that Jeremy and I had gotten there. That was two weeks ago and I hadn't felt normal since then.

"Are you feeling any better?" My brother questioned leaning against my door frame his arms folded across his chest. The past few days I had been sick to my stomach, the slightest movement making me want to vomit. Offering up a small smile I nodded at my brother, already knowing what it was but not really able to admit it to myself quite yet.

"Im fine." I forced out ready for him to leave, needing to get into the bathroom to see for myself what I already knew. Jeremy nodded before walking away from my room. Scrambling to my feet I pushed away from my bed and grabbed the little white test off of the counter, sinking to the floor, my back resting against the bathtub. Drawing my knees up I rested my head against them wondering what the hell I was going to do the two blue plus signs staring up at me.

**A/n- as always thank you to everyone that reviewed I really appreciate it. There is one more chapter after this one and then we go into Damon's half of the story. As I said they will have a happy ending so keep that in mind. Anyways please don't forget to review cause reviews are inspiration and help me to keep going. Until next time happy reading**.


	16. My Way Home Is Through You

**My way home is through you**

**Gonna take off all my skin,**

**Tear apart all of my insides,**

**When they rifle in,**

**Mom and Dad think you'll be saved,**

**They never had the time,**

**They're gonna medicate your lives,**

**You were always born a crime,**

**We salute you in your grave.**

**Can't find my way home,**

**But it's through you and I know,**

**What I'd do just to get back in her arms,**

**Can't find my way home,**

**But it's through you and I know,**

**What I'd do just to get back in her arms**.

_**5 years later**_

"Elena you're gonna be late!" I groaned rolling over in bed and attempted to pull my blankets over my head. Faintly I could hear April-Grace, my four year old daughter, giggling coming from the kitchen.

"Elena Jane!" Tugging the blankets down I narrowed my eyes at my brother and sat up. Ever since my daughter had been born he was there, babysitting on the nights that I worked at the Mystic Grill as a bartender and just being a positive constant male figure in my daughters life and an annoying pain in my ass. I hadn't seen her father in the years since I had said goodbye and doubted that Damon even knew that he had a child. Slinking out of bed I ignored the look that my brother gave me as I headed into the kitchen and a fresh cup of coffee. April-Grace was sitting at the table the remains of her lunch sitting at the table in front of her.

"Morning mommy." She smiled and my heart clenched as I stared upon Damon's mirror image. From the jet black curls that hung down her back to her baby blue eyes and the smile that could make you do anything that she asked you too my daughter looked identical to her father, barely a trace of me anywhere in her. Leaning down I kissed her head and walked over to the coffee maker and poured myself a glass. Jeremy leaned against the counter in the kitchen and tilted his head as he watched me.

"You have to call her back at some point Elena and let her know that you're going and that it will be just you and April-Grace, that you don't have a date you're bringing." Groaning I shook me head. My aunt Jenna was finally tying the knot with Ric and had asked Jeremy and I to attend with dates. I was dreading going, it would be the first time that I had seen Damon in five thought of him still managed to send shivers down my spine and make my stomach roll and it had been years. Briefly I wondered if he would even remember me, wondered if he thought of me like I still thought of him but then Katherine kept popping into me head and I found I didn't want to know.

"Just call her and tell her three for me. I have a date."

And it was true I did have a date, the first one since Damon. He had come up to the bar the night before with his blondish brown hair and bright green eyes, all smiles as he flirted with me and it had felt good, but it wasn't the same, he wasn't Damon. For the first little while I had tried to ignore him but he was persistent, even going as far as to defend me when one of the less then sober patrons tried to get a little two friendly with me and for payment for helping he asked me out to coffee and I accepted. We sat for hours in the small little coffee shop, talking about this and that. He was the youngest in his family and like me his parents had died some time ago. For the first time in years I had felt someone what normal... Like I wasn't this broken person that I had felt like since I had left Damon. When I got the text from Jeremy around four in the morning wondering where I was I made my excuses and said I needed to get home to my daughter. The fact that I had a child didn't even seem to phase him instead he just smiled and nodded saying that he hoped he could see me again. With that I did something that I would probably regret and asked him to be my date for my aunts wedding claiming that while I knew it was quick I would really appreciate it. He had smiled that charming smile of his and said he would love too.

I was drawn out of my musing my Jeremy snapping his fingers in front of my face a phone pressed against his ear.

"Jenna wants to know what your dates name is so she can plan out the seating chart and wants to know if you'll be requiring separate rooms in the house."

Licking my lips I glanced at my daughter as she finished off the rest of her lunch.

"Two rooms please." I finally managed to mutter turning back towards my coffee. Jeremy repeated the two rooms part before tapping on my shoulder.

"Still need a name Lena." He reminded me, sounding almost like he didn't believe that I had a date to bring with me.

"Stefan."

**A/n- as always thank you to everyone that reviewed I really appreciate it. This is the last chapter in this book, a sudden cut off I know but it's because the first chapter of Damon's book will pick up right where this one ended. It should be up within the next day or so. Anyways please remember** **to review. Until next time happy reading. **


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